Attracting Positive Relationships
"Energy flows where attention goes."
A Huna saying that has found a new set of followers through the book, "The Secret", this is what was emblazoned on a bookmark I received for Christmas from a dear friend. And although I've heard the phrase before, for some reason this time I can't get it out of my head.
Like many singles, I too get stuck sometimes thinking about the "nts" in my dating life. Some of the ones I've heard recently from readers:
- I don't feel attractive/skinny/smart enough;
- Why couldn't s/he have given me a chance/been faithful/trusted me;
- I'll never find a date/love/satisfaction in a relationship...
You get my jist. We all have our 'nts', and some are a bit more challenging than others. But what if we were to ignore those 'nts', just for a couple of days, and focus instead on what we want to bring into our lives, essentially attracting the kind of energy/relationship we're looking for?
About.com's Guide to Holistic Healing has written a lovely article about Attracting Positives, using a technique that focuses on surrounding yourself with positive images, whether they be physical, mental or spiritual manifestations. I think I'll create my own little Book of Positives, kind of like the one in Queen Latifah's movie, Last Holiday as my gift to myself these next few days. My pre- New Years' resolution, if you will.
What about you? How do you stay positive when dating, or looking for love? What techniques have worked for you?
More on this topic: Relationship Expectations
Comments
I totally believe in the power of intention. And what a perfect time of the year to be reminded of it! I think that focusing on what we DO have and what we’re most grateful for - regardless of our partnering status - creates the right energy for all kinds of wonderful things to happen!
Research consistently shows that behavior is more influenced by positive reinforcement than by negative reinforcement or punishment. This is the ‘getting more flies with honey’ approach to behavior modification. Plus, who wants to be around someone negative?
Great Article. You guys rock for chat and dating advice. Keep it coming.
I am so grateful to have found your blog and this entry. Thanks so much again for your time.
I had heard that before - to ask for what you want in a person, in life and the universe will bring that person, that situation to you. And I thought what the heck - why not? So I did. I said aloud all the traits I wanted in a man (not what I didn’t want) - only the positives. Two months later I met him - but didn’t put 2 and 2 together until now - 6 mos together - I realize I met the man I ‘wished’ for. Amazing but true story.