Mercedes asks, "What does it mean if you find an unwrapped condom in your boyfriends truck, and he says his friend accidentally left it there because he lent out his truck so the friend could see a girl?"
Touchy question Mercedes, and a lot of how I'd answer this dating question depends on your relationship about both how the information was shared, as well as how it went down. Have you been dating more than six months, or is this a relatively new relationship? Has your boyfriend given you reason not to trust him before? Are the two of you using condoms? Have you been tested recently for STDs? Does your boyfriend routinely lend out his truck to friends for similar reasons? Was the condom merely unwrapped or (ick) used?
These types of situations are always shocking to someone who didn't see it coming no matter how solid your relationship is or how long you've been dating. Sure, your boyfriend could have warned you that he lent out his truck before the nasty surprise, but if he really did do as he's saying, then its also not unheard of to have that kind of detail slip his mind either. I'll talk more about this in a moment.
At the same time, you don't want to be risking your sexual health with a man who isn't trustworthy either. Has he given you reason to be suspicious before? Have you been going through a rocky patch? Has he shown any other signs of cheating? If he has, I'd be both having a discussion with him about it as well as not having unprotected sex with the man. But if he's given you no other reason to question him, why would you start now?
But what do you think dear readers? Should Mercedes be worried, has she not given us enough information, or are there other things you'd suggest she try?
I’ve dated a couple of cheaters, and they always have the best stories to explain any evidence you may uncover that would suggest indiscretions…and often they blame it on “a friend”. When I was in those relationships, because I genuinely liked the guys, I wanted to believe them so badly that I’d willingly accept their explanations, no matter how unlikely the stories seemed. Eventually, the evidence piled up to the point that I knew I could no longer respect myself if I continued to accept the lies. In both of these cases, the guys were serial cheaters, so eventually there WAS more evidence, especially once I started paying better attention. I couldn’t begin to guess whether or not Mercedes’ man is telling her the truth or not (it’s certainly possible), but if he’s running around on her, and she stays alert, she’ll find her proof sooner or later. Cheating usually isn’t a one-off occurrence.
he should at least try to understand him, but she should be observant, she has to be careful, just the just in case thing