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Bonny Albo

Dating Younger Men

By April 3, 2012

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A reader wants to know: I recently started dating a man almost seven years younger than I am. I'm mid-30s, BTW. So far, it's great.

Still, I've never dated a man more than about a year or two younger than I am. What, if any, pitfalls should I be prepared for that are specific to this sort of age difference.

Who has dated a significantly younger guy? Any advice?

Comments
April 13, 2008 at 2:44 pm
(1) Kat Murphy says:

i’m 59 look and act 10 to 20 years younger. Listen to the age they grew up in in music/ other than that there is no difference as it is a person inside and not an age that determines oneself.

April 14, 2008 at 5:37 am
(2) april says:

be extremely careful with the younger guys. i’m going to be 29 soon and in the last year i’ve started dating younger men. the youngest was 21 the second youngest was 23. i didn’t have a good realationship with either. it is true that women mature sooner than men. if you are like me and don’t feel as old as people think you should be, then a younger man seems ideal. in the long run, they just don’t cut it. they are still in a state of boyhood. maybe women like us, could pull it off if we were demi and 40 and our men where 25, but now is not the time!!!!!!! we need to have a good, mature, successfull man now and i believe that means, in the least, a man that is the same age as we are. maybe your situation is different. i’m never been married, i don’t have kids and i’m educated. i don’t even really think those things are even top….it’s priorities that really let u know who people are and i just don’t believe younger men have their priorities straight!!!!

May 23, 2011 at 2:23 am
(3) Jarrod says:

I believe this is the exact sort of stereotypical, closed mindedness, that continues to keep a sort of taboo hanging over mine and my g/f’s 3yr relationship. I understand that this may be your limited experience but my g/f (13 yrs my senior) and I have been carrying on a wonderful relationship. One-sided, narrowly written, and loosely researched information like this will never aid in the banishing of stereotypes.

July 13, 2011 at 10:36 pm
(4) Diane says:

Hi Jarrod,

Thank you for your post. I recently started dating a guy 17 years younger than me. I am 43 and he is 26. When we met he had an idea I was older than him, but how much older was a surprise to him, as was his age to me. I do not look 43, I look more like 33. We have many common interests as well as great chemestry. Since being divorced, (4 years) I have dated younger men, but never expected one being 17 years younger would be the one that I consider actually lasting. He recently told his parents about me, something that I had been asking him to hold off on. They seem to understand and be ok with our relationship, which is a huge relief and allows us to nuture our relationship in a positive way. He is such a great guy, we have a wonderful relationship and shows me how much he cares for me all the time. I say, more women should date younger men and be open minded to how it can work… :D

Also, I have children ages 8 and 11. We are slowly introducing them to each other. He said he wants children someday and somehow I hope that can work out too.

November 4, 2011 at 2:36 pm
(5) Nqanqa says:

Thank you Jarroid i am a bit releaved though i am not sure of this relationship because i found out myself that he is younger than me he does not know that i know and i am keen to ask him but i dont know how to approach him. im 30 and he is 26, we have been together for 6 months now he told me that he is 30 as well untill i saw the proof of residence when he accidentaly left in the car.

August 20, 2011 at 7:52 am
(6) Crystal says:

April, I so agree with you. Younger men suck! I was attracted to a 22 year old. I am 28. I thought he was mature, open-mind for his again worldly. This relationship, didn’t go anywhere And I’m glad. It was still getting to know stage.

This boy was not as mature as I thought he was, or control in his life as he seem. And not open-minded as I thought he was.

First red flag: He acted like an emo. “I am not happy, but I am little happy when I talk to you.

Second red flag: “I take medication for my depression ”

(When I was in my 21 I dealt with a man with Schizophrenia, so I am edgy when some one tells me they have depression problems)

Third red flag: “I am only happy when I am the leader of a group or alone”

(So in other words he likes to control people.) I am not woman easily control.

He says he likes strong women, he can;t even handle my strong opinions…

October 10, 2011 at 3:15 am
(7) Donna says:

Crystal this doesnt sound like a young man, this could me any man. He sounds like he has a few issues he needs to work on but I dont think growing up was one of them.

August 20, 2011 at 7:53 am
(8) Crystal says:

….Fourth red flag: He seem to be like more than one person. His moods change to the extreme and it very hard to see where he stands.

Not very open-minded about other people’s opinion. We had different views on historical person. I had my views and he his. And I told him “We have to agree to disagree” No he had wanted you to agree with him, because he doesn’t like being wrong. I am sorry, it doesn’t work like that. I don’t want to be with someone who isn’t mature enough to handle other’s opinions. I don’t like it when people twist my words around and say things I didn’t say.

fifth red flag: Telling me “I no longer love my ex, but she still lives with me. I want her to go, but she doesn’t want to leave. And I feel sorry for her because she comes from a third world country, because her family lives in a small house.

I am not stupid. That is crap. The reason why he doesn’t want to do anything about it, because he likes having a house bunny. I don’t feel sorry for him or for her. And this speaks loads about his character. He isn’t the kind to take charge of his life, he wants to seem like a man, but in reality he is a wuss. And he is very stupid, if he let his ex control him.

I saw through his shit, called him on it, and now he thinks I am cold-hearted and don’t understand the situation and shouldn’t judge. And the situation is different. That is BS. I been down this road before and walk the blocks of life more times than him.

And when he can see through him he gets all mad.

Young men just don’t get it, they are so naive and so quick to jump because of their emotions. These boys are really sensitive. They haven’t toughen up. They could never handle a real woman has much as they want too. I am going to stick with older men. They have more character, and they live life with passion.

November 4, 2011 at 2:48 pm
(9) nqanqa says:

Crystal you have made very good points and real one some of your facts are what i am experiencing though yours sounds as if they are in extremes, as for me i realy don know how to quit because i love him but his moods are very insane today he is sweet all of a sudden i have to take his word as independent as i am, he is very selfish, immatured, Moody, unreasoning and too chidish sometimes

April 14, 2008 at 2:04 pm
(10) Jenn says:

I have been dating a guy that is 6 yrs younger than me (31). We have been seeing each other since Nov. 07. Yes sometimes he does act like a boy but also acts like a man. He is stable & is going back to school. I have dated & married men my age & I feel that it doesn’t matter how old they are they can still be losers.

April 14, 2008 at 8:11 pm
(11) Nina says:

As long as two people connect, nobody should define a relationship by an individual’s age. I am 39, and I look and feel about 15 years younger than I am.
In my opinion, no matter what age – women will always be more mature than men. However, the age of the men we choose to date is a matter of preference.

April 17, 2008 at 1:01 am
(12) Kate says:

My last two boyfriends and my current boyfriend have all been about 5 years younger than me. I guess the main problem is different priorities in life. You may be ready to settle down and have kids, but he feels too young for that. You may be considering investing in property, time in your career etc and he isn’t in that headspace.
But as always- it’s what works for the two of you. Also- don’t always go on about how much younger they are- if they don’t care, they don’t want to hear it and if they do care, they will be off anyway ;)

April 18, 2008 at 4:43 pm
(13) Carol Burns says:

If I was you be careful as I have being out with younger guys, at the time it is great as it makes you look and feel young at heart.

But I guess the main problem is different priorities in life, you might want to settle down where he still want to spend, spend, spend, as he feels too young for to settle down.

April 21, 2008 at 7:59 pm
(14) SHARI says:

I (45) have been dating a guy (36) since 2006 and it has been great. I don’t look my age -15 yrs and he has never dated younger than himself.I say go for it and enjoy every moment it brings you; I know I do!!!!!! If you know what I mean..

April 26, 2008 at 4:31 pm
(15) tami says:

get a man your age if not a little older, a younger one will only make u miserable and some luck of maturity can irritate you.

April 26, 2008 at 4:33 pm
(16) tami says:

young or old what matters is how you are treated and if you are happy!

April 29, 2008 at 4:21 pm
(17) Kay says:

I say go for it! I am a 31 yr. old who has been involved with a 24 yr old for 8 months now and for the most part it has been wonderful. He is a hardworking, very kind individual who happens to be more mature than I am in so many ways. We have disagreements but they are more so due to gender differences than age. We are total opposites and totally crazy about each other. Wishing you the best!

April 30, 2008 at 12:01 pm
(18) mary says:

you go honey enjoy raise him the way you want him the younger the better

May 2, 2008 at 11:59 am
(19) Diane says:

I(40) am actually like a man(35)very much and beliece he has interest in me. But so troubled about the age difference. I hesitate to talk to him. If I don’t feel enough confidence and “yong” inside to be with him, the relationship will not last long even we may have it.

With this thought, I do not know what to do.

May 5, 2008 at 8:32 am
(20) Jen says:

My mother was older than my father and they remained married until she died. Dating younger men comes with the same problems as dating men of any age.

June 9, 2008 at 12:13 pm
(21) Cydni says:

I am 27 and dating a 22 year old. I am a professional, a Director of my own Non-Profit program, and finished with graduate school. With that being said, after having my own house and car…theres nothing I need a man to do, other than love me and treat me right. However, on occasions, I am reminded of his age, not necessarily our age difference. But all in all, he means a lot to me…I am enjoying our building process.

July 21, 2008 at 11:25 am
(22) Cgirl says:

Go for it… it’s been working for me for a year and 4 months. 17 year age difference (22/39)…some days it’s stressful, but isn’t anything? It’s all in the PERSON! This is the most loving and honest relationship I’ve had in my life!

September 14, 2010 at 6:28 pm
(23) courtlyn says:

I am with a 17 year younger man and we have been together for 16 months and things are really good. I’m a little scared of what’s to come though. I’ll just take it for what it is and be happy while every things wonderful.

April 23, 2011 at 11:48 am
(24) Nightmax says:

Well, I hate to be crass, but honestly so young . . . I gather the real reason you are with him is not for who he is or could become — be honest, we all know what’s in it for you. So all I as is that you treat him well, do not abuse or use him. These are there formative years and they want to please whomever they are with. Why would I be concerned, because although it is not my son, it could be.

I often wonder when I meet men who are tarnish, on their guard and what could have happened to get them here, I think of women like you.

If you are a nice woman and have no intention but to treat him well, more power to you, but here in America, I seriously doubt it since it is a land of taking what you can get.

July 11, 2011 at 2:29 am
(25) Emma says:

I don’t agree with the first part of your statement and nor do I agree that all people are pure ‘takers’. I also don’t agree that dating younger men is limited to just one thing….you obviously think older women care only about this…you are wrong….we need connection, chemistry, fun too.

I have just started seeing a 24 year old and I am 36. I am uncomfortable about it – hence reading up on websites like this! But he doesn’t care one little bit. I am leaning towards the view that age really is just a number – it’s the person and who they are that matters.

I do agree however, that younger men are more vulnerable and should be treated with more care than a man my own age. I fully intend to treat him in such a way that shows him how amazing it can be with a woman and hope that he then carries that on with the next girl he meets.

August 2, 2008 at 3:06 am
(26) oldie says:

I just started dating a much younger man. I have never dated a man more than one year younger or 2 years older. I am 44 and he is 21. He pursued me and after much resistance from me, I finally gave in and went on a date. I thought he would see the light and move on after the first date. I didn’t think we would hit it off and I thought I had lost my mind for going. We did hit it off and went on a second date. What am I thinking shouldn’t I come to my seances. He is very good looking and so much so the young girls would be in dream land to go out with such a nice and good looking guy. He said he has always been attracted to older women. He has a very good career and his life all in order. Why do I feel like I’ve broken all the rules? I have not told any one about this, should I keep on dating him?

September 18, 2010 at 3:07 pm
(27) Lola 6 says:

I did what u did oldie… Iam 43 and he was 23…he persued me…bedded me..dated me… then his friends put their 2 cents in and so did mine. He kept me a secret..blew me off..lied to me.. then after a few breakups.. came back…told me he loved me and wanted a committed relationship. Needless to say that was short lived becasue once another wman gave him a second look he was gone. We are broken up now.. although I am hurt I will not be used or anyones back up plan…so the next time he shows up he better come with a ring, introduce me to his family and alll his friends, he better have his act tougether, as I am notsure if I could put my foot in any other way. My advice is BE CAREFUL

June 19, 2011 at 9:38 pm
(28) BEENTHERE2 says:

I, too am dating a man 15 years younger than I and have read many of the comments on this site praising the joys of dating a younger man. In yours, I see the same pattern. He will not introduce me to his family or friends.He attends events wothout me. We have dated 6 months. Today he told me he was going to a wedding this weekend without me. Now I definitely get it and he is getting the boot. Very liberating to see it in writing.

November 15, 2011 at 10:50 pm
(29) silent one says:

I’m 36with 3kids n have been dating guy who’s 24..everything is sogreat between us despite the age difference…he’s affectionate n is so good to me in everyway …almost to good to b true is what we both Say. He’s in school n has a good job n hopes that maybe when he’s done with school in 3 years that we both can have a place of our own…He was introduced me to half of he’s family n he’s friends….There is one thing though I’m separated but still married n he said that things woukdonly get better when I finalize my divorce…I’m so into this guy…yea I can actually say that I love Him n has recently after dating For6months said that he loves me….he’s so mature forhis age n I look 25 not 36….I’m a Latin n his white…..could this really work out?…IDK but I’m goin.g with my heart n feelings n so is he

August 4, 2008 at 10:37 pm
(30) Kallie says:

I have always dated men much older than myself. I’m 25 and I’ve always dated men at least 15 years older than me. None of those relationships have worked out though. So now, I’ve met a man that is 21, he’ll be 22 soon. It’s strange that he’s younger than me, but I’m trying not to let it bother me, because so far he has been so wonderful. Sweet, just a perfect gentleman, opening doors, being so respectful…I think I’m going to give it a try and just pay attention to how he treats me.

August 6, 2008 at 1:39 pm
(31) kylie says:

I think what matters is how he treats you and loves you. It is all in the person and how you both adjust to each other. Although sometimes there may be things that you can’t talk about because younger guys tend to be still immature, it’s up to you to find ways to get around it. Enjoy life!Don’t be restricted by the norms imposed by society ‘coz at the end of the day, it’s your own happiness that matters.

August 10, 2008 at 5:17 am
(32) NIA says:

I AGREE WITH HER ,LOVE LIFE AND LIVE IT. I’M DATING A 24 YOUR OLD AND WE ARE JUST ENJOYING EACH OTHER AND WHAT EVER HAPPENS, HAPPENS! FALL BACK A LITTLE

August 11, 2008 at 4:39 am
(33) Moana says:

Im dating a guy who is four years younger than me. I am 23 he is 19 and after dating older men this is the first time it feels right. I don’t think age is important at all, if its the right person . Just listen to your heart and enjoy what you have. To be honest I was sceptical to start with as well, even tho our age difference isn’t really that big. After a while I realised , that it was mainly me being concerned about what my friends and family would say. I soon got over that tho.

August 31, 2008 at 12:30 pm
(34) Marina says:

I was just having a discussion with my family about my current boyfriend. I am 21 and he is 19. Everything thus far, has been amazing, i never received such treatment from any man that i have ever dated. To me, age is a number, a simple number. Like many of you said, you were hesitant at first, as was I. My family especially, they do not like the fact that he is younger than me and encourages me that he is too young. I like to go out with my friends, sometimes to a bar and unfortunately he cannot accompany me. Anyway, enough with my rambling, the point is… don’t let the perceptions of society hold you back from experiencing something that could turn out to be amazing.

September 3, 2008 at 3:39 pm
(35) Bekah says:

So…here I am at this crazy stage in my life where I find myself falling for a much younger man..I am 36 and he is 19…I know…what a difference! But you know what? He has been the most sweetest, loving, caring, respectful man I have ever dated. I have usually dated younger men(maybe up to 8 years younger)but never have I dated someone this much younger..But I like it…He keeps me feeling young and vibrant…I was pretty hesitant at first because in the back of my mind I would say “oh gosh what would people think about me!” But really…who cares what others say about it…if it is not age or race people who want to criticize will always find something to talk about anyway so what have I got to lose! I am trying to live my life to make ME happy..I look forward to seeing where this may progress to:) He is awesome and I have been waiting to feel like this for a very long time..I am not going to give it up for anyone:)

September 7, 2008 at 12:49 am
(36) Isabelle says:

Hi, just wanted to let you know that I have been married for 4 years to a man 5 years younger than myself…this is not the first time I dated anyone younger than myself..I will say, I have a lot more fun with men younger than me than with an older man…Keep dating young…Age is but a number..I strongly recommend it to all women…Go for it!!!

September 11, 2008 at 3:51 am
(37) Marilize says:

There is this guy who is totally into me. The problem is… he is 16 and I am 22. He is the youngest child and all his siblings are much older (32 and 25) and he has only ever dated older women.
I think that maybe it could work later on, but right now… He is still finishing school (home school) and I am starting my professional career in 4 months. Ok, so much for what my mind tells me… my heart… he is great and he makes me feel like the most amazing person ever. We share priorities and principles and he is the cutest guy ever! I don’t know what to do.

August 16, 2011 at 1:03 pm
(38) Luct says:

I found it ok, Im 24 and my boyfriend has just turned 18. Ive been with him for just over 3 years, while he was still at school, and also to add to that I tower over him in hight, (im about 6’2, think he’s only 4’10?) and almost always in 6 inch heels.

But what won me over, was that he was always polite, he blushed and went all shy every time he was around me (still does) and my friends and treats me like a princess. My heart melted.

Even though he’s a midgit lol, younger and a really shy guy, akk my friends love him and are all close friends with him, and I wouldn’t change it for the world

September 30, 2008 at 3:53 pm
(39) Cheryl says:

Ok, so I read through all that was listed above. My problem, I’m 45 and he’s 24. Yikes! I’m recently divorced. He seeked me out and was so charming. We have dated twice and he constantly gets in touch with me and says he wants to see me more. The age difference bothers me a LOT!! But I have to say, he was so wonderful when we were together. If it weren’t for the age difference, I would definitely be with him. Is that too much of an age difference?

September 6, 2010 at 3:02 am
(40) kelly says:

ok i have been married twice and once for eighteen years i am 43 have never been pregnant i met a 23 year old and we hit it off I got pregnant i was in shock he is now 25 and i still have trouble wondering about our age difference i used to be rich and live in so ca but now am in az and living in apt with an 8 month old it is great because i get along with him but am always on guard and never feel comfy wish i was with someone my own age i am very attractive but having someone this young makes me feel uncomfortable even tho he works 2 jobs now and trys everything to make me happy i am used to a better life and not worriying about younger women

October 5, 2010 at 10:46 am
(41) yaz says:

well, i just turned 32 this month. i have been currently dating a 24 year old for the past year. we have been hitting it off pretty well. Now im divorced and have two children now preteens and cd never have any more children. He tells me he doesnt care and we can always adopt but it does worry me. He may feel that way now but someday that cd change. Also im a certified dental assitant and my guy never even finished college and doesnt have much a career. Finacially that can annoying. we are in two completley different levels but he does try hard to please me. In the end i do love him and he loves me and i never been treated ever so sweetly. So i hold on. Like they say u can always trained them to be how u want them to be. If that is even true. But i can admit it can be a struggle. but curiousiy is on my side hopefully it doesnt kill me in the end. haha. All in all I enjoy the moment and cherish what we have but i do stay guarded knowing someday something younger, better w a working oven may come along and snatch him away at any time. So i try to stay prepared. hope that helped a little

October 1, 2008 at 1:58 pm
(42) CalamityAnnie says:

I am 61, looking 40 acting 30 at heart and dating a 22 year old and very mature young man from another country and, after 2 failed marriages many years ago to 2 men 10 years older than me, I am loving him and the entire scenario. He treats me better than either of my American husbands, respects my family and my wishes as I do his. This is an untraditional romance w/two untraditional people who feel the lightening as it strikes. I am of the age I do not care what others think – some love it and some do not – it is our lives and we will live it as we please. I am not living thru another era like the 50′s and 60′s with segregation and prejudice – not again – not for me.

August 13, 2011 at 8:13 pm
(43) sonnyjanduathotmaildotcom says:

Ok this kid doesn’t have mommy issues. He has grandmommy issues. LOL That’s gross!

October 5, 2008 at 7:29 pm
(44) Maria says:

OMG…I’m 42, feel like 25, look like 35. I was recently approached by a bold 21 year old, from my blind side and I’ve never saw it coming! I’m a professional, divorced mother, own my own home, and life has been maintainable! I absolutely find it flattering that I still attract such young men. I’ve had the family life and already all the children. I don’t need or want anything from this guy. But I absolutely do enjoy his “youthfulness”, I don’t know where this is going. But I’m enjoying every minute of it. I would just be careful not to get to emotionally involved, these young men still need to live a life, a life we older gals already lived. It’s just a matter of time before our physical appearance gives in! JUST enjoy it while it last!

November 22, 2008 at 5:20 am
(45) Sandirah says:

Through my experience, I’ve enjoyed dating a younger man.
There is one thing about MATURITY.
One can be young and mature, one can mature by age and still immature.
There is nothing like mature experiences w/c comes with age. I look young, feel young, act young and don’t even second guess my age. I’m 37, he’s 25.
We have fun, he’s honest, hardworking and treats me w/ respect and appreciates me for who I am.
All that is important to me.
The downfall is….men are not going to ever be as emotionally mature and adept to women at any age. They will always be boys. The under 30 men still need to go through some rites of passage.
So my 2 cents..watch out about getting emotionally involved or attached.
Just have fun.
The trill of the chase for the boy/man can easily get him into a cold-feet stage even w/o pressure because we women are confident enough to be who we are at most any age above 28.

December 2, 2008 at 11:22 am
(46) Kay says:

I am 44 and I am dating a 24 year old. My experience has been that he has his priorties straight. I will mention that he has 3 children by three different women but he’s taking care of his children and he just received his Masters in international business. He a world class travelor and is very caring. He is passionate about family and personal growth. I believe that age is just a number it all comes from inside. I’ve dated men older than my self by twelve years and find that in the end they are basically the same. Maturity has never been an issue with this guy. Actually when he falls into what I call the forbidden zone it free me up and i don’t feel so up tight..Although, i know that this is not a long term relationshp for he and I. I believe the age thing is workable in a relationship.

December 4, 2008 at 12:42 am
(47) Dawn says:

I’m 31 yrs old and I have mostly dated younger men, by about 5 yrs. I have found them to have emotional immaturity and overall not ready for commitment.

So, I told myself to quit dating younger guys and have a real relationship. I don’t ever go looking for younger men, but I very rarely meet older men.

Now, I just started dating a 21 yr old. I did not know he was this age as he acts and looks older. Upon finding out that he was 10 yrs younger, I was somewhat disappointed. We’ve been dating for just over a month.

I decided to just have fun and I have found him to be a great communicator when it comes to emotions/feelings. He has actually helped me to be more assertive with my own feelings, something I have not addressed until meeting him. He treats me like a queen, makes me laugh, is very intelligent, and literally fits my list I wrote up in what I wanted in a future partner. But…..

I have come to find out that he has some very deep rooted emotional/mental health issues that he has not fully addressed. He was open with me about having Bipolar, but there are other things as well. He is not in denial and wants to feel better about himself. I suggested that he make an appointment and get things sorted out, in which he called, at my request.

I have found myself in a situation where I care a lot for him, but then, if he cannot get help and get better, I just can’t be with him. So far he has had a few episodes that have made me uncomfortable because talking with him doesn’t really help. He just comes out of it, but I think he needs support.

Anyways, anyone out there been involved romantically with someone who has mental health issues?

Advice would be greatly appreciated.

December 8, 2008 at 2:40 am
(48) Lane says:

I am 26 and have been dating a 20-year-old for about six months now. It’s the first time I have ever dated a younger man, and it has had its ups and downs, but overall, it has been a good experience. I was very hesitant at first about getting involved, but in the end, I realized it would be stupid to miss out on a potentially good thing just because I was worried about what people might think.

He’s very smart, and I can’t deny the physical attraction. Although I obviously have more education and am farther along in my career, we have similar interests in music, art and politics. I feel like I can teach him a lot, but he also teaches me, especially when it comes to music and technology. When we hang out one on one, it’s great. Socially, it’s a little awkward, because I’m not about to bring him out to any type of professional event, and he obviously can’t come if I go to the bar with my friends. And when I have to hang out with his friends, who are guys in their early 20s, but not necessarily as mature as him, I get bored and/or annoyed.

Still, I basically am secure enough in myself and where I am in my life and career that I don’t need a man to take care of me. I just want to be with someone who I like and have a good time with, and that is the case with him.

I don’t expect it to last forever, but it’s good for right now, and to other women who may find themselves attracted to a younger man and aren’t sure what to do, I would give the same advice my best friend gave to me (courtesy of Dan Savage): Observe campground rules, and leave him in better condition than you found him.

July 27, 2011 at 11:59 am
(49) Charlie says:

Yes! I’m 27 and dating a 21yo. He is the most purest of heart, kind and genuine guy I’ve ever met. After a few weeks I thought ‘this guy is the one!’.. which I’d never thought anout any guy before.
We’ve been dating for 4 months now, and his immaturity is starting to shine through. Just simple stuff that an older guy would automatically know, whereas he has no clue and that can be frustrating. Also when talking about my problems.. god love him he tries.. but his supportive comments lack the maturity required to help me.. he just doesn’t understand the situation.. which.. is pretty important to have in your partner.
I also have a professional career, and will soon own my own house. He is still living with parents, with a part-time job that doesnt pay much.
It’s hard to know whether it can work because they ALL are more immature than you in some respects.
And is it just me- or is it hard to.. advance in your own maturity? I feel like his immaurity rubs off on me when I’m around him, and that he looks like it’s a drainer sometimes when I’m being my mature self.. especially around my mature friends.. it’s hard to find a medium.

January 6, 2009 at 7:36 am
(50) tanya says:

it is my first time to date a younger men, he is 18 and am 22, he is so matured and gentalmen more than anyother men, i mean older ones i ever dated, i feel so gud, he s gonna b at the college for two more years while i will be working, it makes him feel insecured, but we have been talking over and he seems to accept everything, we are having nine months now, he cout me an i feelt so damn special that day, go gal gt it… it so amazing!

January 30, 2009 at 9:07 pm
(51) kathie says:

I’m in my late 40′s dating a 22 yr man. He treats me better is more compassionate and thoughtful then any man I’ve ever been involved with. We don’t think this is forever but we do enjoy every day together. My children (older then he) like him and are glad to see me so happy. My friends accept him. Those who care about me don’t judge me, those who judge me? I don’t care about them. Go for it!

February 20, 2009 at 3:49 am
(52) jaclyn says:

I gotta tell ya, I’ve always dated older men and now that I’m dating a younger one I realize why that has been. It wouldn’t be a problem at all aside from the fact that I have had kids for many many years (they are 15 and 7) and he is 24……
All of our fights have to do with my expectations of being a part of a family and his lack of understanding as to how to do that. I keep thinking that if I could just be patient and hold out ’till he’s 30 everything would be okay. Except he’ll want kids then and mine will be in college. Not worth it as far as I’m concerned. This has been a mess and I’ve now dragged my kids into it.

February 24, 2009 at 2:30 pm
(53) Clara says:

Hello everyone,

I’m 41 and dating a younger man that is only 21 years old. We actually moved in together and for the most part everything is going good. He is actually in the military and will be deploying to Iraq in Sept. He is looking to buy a home for us to move to before he leaves. I wanted a puppy and he got me two and says they will protect me while he’s away for his six month tour. I’m falling in love with him, but I keep asking myself, how realistic is this relationship???? I have sons close to his age and they all like eachother and get along great. So I say to those that are holding back from dating a younger man GO FOR IT… It will be an experience you will never ever forget….. Good Luck you all =)

July 26, 2011 at 3:03 pm
(54) Vicki says:

I am 44 dating and having sex with a 25 year old man. I am divorced and have enjoyed the single life. People tell me I don’t look my age and young men approach me all the time. I am enjoying being with this young man. We both know that nothing serious will every come out of it we are just enjoying the time together and great sex.

February 28, 2009 at 10:55 am
(55) confused says:

Well Girls I am in big trouble. I have found my self seeing a man that is 23 I am 32. We stared out as just being friends and hanging out with a group of different people. Every time we would end up in our won little world just joking and having just an attraction that is undeniable between us!
I have been married and have a child. When him and I are together it seems like we donít have a care in the world and the sex is amazing and the chemistry is unbelievable. Still i find myself knowing that we will never have a future, but donít want to give him up! I am stuck between a rock and a hard place. I am so confused on what to do. We spoke last night and he told me he was falling for me and he has never dated someone my age or anyone with a child. He doesnít want anyone to get hurt. I told him we just need to stop thinking so far in advance and just live it day by day to see what happens. DAMN am I wrong for not wanting to give him up, I live the way he makes me feel! He is just a wonderful person inside and out! Any advice?

March 1, 2009 at 1:25 am
(56) Linda says:

I am a 58 year old women dating a very nice/smaart 36 year oid man until he found out I could not have chidldren. he is 46, never married and has never had chidren. My chidren are gone and I have not desire to have move ecven if i could. life wass good until he realised this. now we are over. I wish him well but really mniss his tuoches

April 17, 2011 at 5:36 pm
(57) stranger says:

Hello Linda, you say your 58? surely this guy you was dating must have known that children was not in the future, another thing i found confusing, you said he was 36 then you referred to him as 46 years, however putting that to one a side, he cant have really loved you as having no children is not a reason to end the relationship as there are other options such as adoption or fostering caring. Some thing about your article sounded so sad that i had to write you i hope your life has moved on in a more positive direction all the best from a stranger bye x

March 4, 2009 at 7:49 pm
(58) Leighann says:

I have dated and now I am married to a man 20 years younger than my 48 years. I have been married to older, by 10, and dated my own age, but I love the vibrancy, energy, and fearlessness of the young. I see things brand new every day, and while we hit maturity snags once in awhile, I wouldn’t change anything. Life is full of risks, and someday you’ll sleep forever, it would be a shame if you looked back with regrets of maybe being with the love of your life. Go for it, step off the world and just be in love.

March 12, 2009 at 4:54 am
(59) purple says:

What matters is, are you happy? If thats so, NOTHING can stand in the way.

March 13, 2009 at 11:11 am
(60) rahul says:

the problem is that ladies are most of time are restrict themselves. they are not broad minded’s just go and have a try may be you will get some one like me who is enough mature to understant all the feelings and need of woman. there are lot’s of peoples who are not narrow minded. let have a good luck for you lady if any kind of help i can do for you then call me 9711350568

March 15, 2009 at 8:46 am
(61) cindi says:

im seeing a guy thats 20 years younger than me im 41 he 21 ,its great ,he gives me all the attion i need and i havent been happy like this in years,i dont feel bad about it at all i say go cougars!!!!!!!

March 31, 2009 at 4:23 am
(62) Summer says:

I am also dating a younger guy, im a very young 40 yr old girl.yes girl lol always been treated younger so I tend to not want to grow up. younger men seem attracted to me all the time so I dont hold back. Being i look younger they dont know my age,this guy is 29.he does not know exactly but has taken a guess we have fallen for each other and i feel horrible for holding back on the age issue.Problem is when familys will one day meetup the age may come out and then he may run..not for the age but the lies..be truthful from the start? and lose someone you have a total connection with?If they truly love you they will stay on I Guess..whos the ones to judge or opinionate if two people are happy right? Sad :(

April 1, 2009 at 6:12 pm
(63) raman says:

I am 25 yrs guy,I like older women to date and LTR

April 10, 2009 at 8:42 am
(64) Sharon says:

I am 45 and the guy I am with now is 28. We have a great time together.He is fun, he has responsibilities, 2 kids a job. I just want someone who wants to have fun and live life for what it has to offer. I am a single mom with a good job so why shouldnt we older women be able to do what older men have been doing for years.I will be honest I find younger men more exciting, most older men are set, especially in their ways where sex is concerned, most younger guys are open to new experiences and ways they are teachable..I love it as long as no one gets hurt where is the harm… Try it ladies you might just like it. We ladies in our mid thirties and fortys and fifties. we are the new 20s……

September 9, 2011 at 12:35 pm
(65) rawlings says:

I will like someone like you for a partner.
If you aree realy interested in have real loved one.
Please reply me.
bye and lots of love.
Rawlings

April 14, 2009 at 12:53 am
(66) Audrey says:

I feel really weird about saying this… but nonetheless, I am going to.

I’m 18 (I know… rather young!) and have a 15 yr old guy pursuing me. We’ve really hit it off and he is very mature for his age.

It’s not like I’m planning on marrying this guy, but I still get rude comments from people saying it’s disgusting that i’m seeing someone so much younger than me.

He’s a freshman in high school. I’m a freshman in college. However, he is old enough to be a sophomore and I am young enough to be a senior (in h.s.) so I don’t really see what the big problem is!

We are NOT having sex and neither of us plan to until he is of age. (we’d actually prefer to wait until marriage, but you never know what’s gonna happen). I know that it’s not illegal for me to be dating him… unless we have sex, which we aren’t!

SOOOOOO…. my question is; I am wasting my time dating him?

I’m 18. I don’t want to settle down right now. But I don’t see any harm in dating someone younger than me…

July 27, 2011 at 11:48 am
(67) Mooshka says:

There is none!
I dated a 15yo when I was 18 too! We were together for 18 months. As long as you’re having fun it shouldn’t matter.. it didn’t faze us despite the craddle-snatcher comments etc.. water off a ducks back!
The only thing that f*cked it up was that I was his first long term gf.. and after a while.. with all the other good looking girls his age around.. he ended up dumping me for another girl, then subsequently when that short lived fling ended he had a whole string of girls for a few years.
I’m not saying all guys are the same, but I got very invested into it and was crushed because he was young, and wanted to ‘play the field’ while he was young of age..
So my advice is have fun but be careful.. if you give your whole heart to him, depending on who he is, his age might inevitably end up leading him down the path of pursuing other women.
Hope this helps!

April 15, 2009 at 11:49 pm
(68) Amy says:

I recently started dating a guy that is 12 years younger than me and it has been FANTASTIC! He is amazing and well beyond his years. I truly enjoy his company and knows what’s going on with older women. I really don’t look at our age difference since we seem to be on the same page and work as much as one another. Amazing both physically and mentally and emotionally. Love it!

April 25, 2009 at 11:25 am
(69) daniela magana says:

I’m 28 and i have always dated men my age or older then I, just recently i began dating a man who is 21. his back ground and life experience has made him mature very early in his life, and unlike some men my age he is ready to settle down and have children. in all honesty i’m the one who isn’t ready for that commintment. not all younger men are imature you just need to get to know the person before you start a relationship.

April 28, 2009 at 4:18 pm
(70) Jessica says:

Well, I seem only to be able to meet men younger than I… When I was in my 20s, I met early 20s; in my 30s I met men in their 20s. I did have a 3 yr relationship w/ someone exactly my age, but it was exhausting (because of the person, not the age).

I agree w/ a few of the other comments that younger men are vibrant, fresh, and not weighted down by a lot of baggage. Also, yes, the mail problem is where one is in life. I am 39 and while I look and act much younger, I still would like to maybe have a family. I was dating someone in his early 20s, and while he was so mature I thought he was in his 30s, at the end of the day he wasn’t.

I say go for it. Younger men have a lot to offer, and they are more open and flexible. Just be relaxed about it and if it progresses a few years, then I would make some decisions so that you don’t end up in a 10 year relationship that goes no where. However, listen to what he says. If he says he doesn’t want a relationship, believe him.

April 28, 2009 at 10:52 pm
(71) Jennifer says:

I was married to a man from El Salvador who was 20 years younger for nine years, until he passed away. Because he had a tough life until just before he met me, people thought I was younger than him when we met. At the time because the internet was not that big, so he had some old fashioned ideas. I had been a feminist and changed after I decided feminism was just another form of controlling a woman, just as men had in the past. He was intelligent enough to know how to pull his weight in the house and at work. He was 23 and I was 43 when we met, and I refused to act like his mother. We had a business together. So it worked.

But when he passed away and I began dating again, I realized this type of wonderful relationship was in the past. Today, I wouldn’t date a man with that much age difference, because I would suspect they were seeking either just a sexual relationship, or money. I am seeing a man ten years younger though, and have been for eight months. I’m 54 now, and lost my husband two years ago, so this is all new again, since I have just gotten back to dating. What I found in the men my age is that they were bitter, had too much baggage, and seemed pessimistic about life. Many of them had surreal expectations in women that rivaled the Victorian Era. I found them boorish.

I don’t judge men as much by age as by attitude. When we met, my new boyfriend was seeing women in their late 30′s and early 40′s and he dropped them for me, knowing I was 54, because he liked the fact that I’m what he calls “arrogant,” which means I don’t take crap off of men and know I can meet men just walking down the street and do. The key is not age, but personalities. What does he offer you? Do you have similar appearances agewise? Is he independent? If so, then age doesn’t matter. If he needs help, then send him to the next victim. Mothering in relationships never works.

May 15, 2009 at 12:21 am
(72) nearing 40 says:

I have always dated older men (by 1-5 years). Now that I have just had my 2nd divorce (he was not mature enough to handle the responsibility of marriage even though he is 42)I am not interested in marriage anymore. I find myself having a “crush” on a man I can only assume to be about 10-12 years younger than me (1′m 39). He works at my apartment and I have just chatted with him in passing. He is always friendly and initiates our conversations. I know he can tell that I think he is just the cutest thing! (you know how we get around men we like). Not sure what to do with this. Any suggestions??

May 20, 2009 at 2:22 pm
(73) JackieG. says:

Well I dated a 15yrold about 1 1/2 ago for a few months he was so sweet, the cute names, i loved everything about him. During that time I was working and going to school and i got my 2nd job I was so busy and hated that i had to wait for him to get out of school to see him. In my my new job I met a guy who was 40yrs old started going out to lunch we clicked and felt like my time was being wasted dating a younger guy broke it off. I dated this man for about a 1 yr and had so many problems because he had kids and so many things going on in his life and expected so much from me then i dated a 21 yr old for 3 weeks who was a total dumb ass.NOW THOSE 2 GUYS WERE A WASTE OF MY VALUABLE TIME. the 15yr old is now 17 and i will be 22 pretty soon, we are talking again and i am hoping we can work things out again I dont care what people think or say its my happiness that counts and ofcourse his. Its ok to give ppl something to talk about since they are so miserable

June 1, 2009 at 1:55 pm
(74) Nosila says:

I’m currently dating a man 18 yrs. younger than myself. He’s sexy and hot and we’ve known eachother as friends for three years. I don’t know where it will go, only that I’m having a great time right now! I look about 10 yrs younger, and he looks older, so perhaps people don’t think he’s my son, just a boy toy.

June 8, 2009 at 11:25 pm
(75) Mia says:

Wow! I’m not alone, I’m 36 years old,and I have been dating a guy age 25 on and off for over a year, now its more on that off. I’m scared too death that he will find someone younger, you know, men are easily distracted! I agree with most the post on here, I have to say that this is the most loving, caring and respectful relationship I’ve ever been in. He’s the best to me and I could never ask for anything any better. BUT he’s sooooo Gorgeous! Any girl would die for him, and well, he knows it! But oh he treats me like a queen ALL the time! Im really too emotional for the relationship, I have him on my mind constantly and if one little things seems out of order, I freak out! I keep thinking he don’t want me, or he is seeing someone else! Well, All I can say is this: If you are happy and being treated well, stay where you are, if you are arguing and having to deal with that sort of thing, get out, and that goes for any relationship no matter how young!

June 10, 2009 at 1:50 pm
(76) Leigh says:

I would not recommend it. I am from the rockies too btw. I am mid thirties and look younger. I get hit on by younger men all the time. When I tell them my age, they are stunned for a moment and then back off. It is painful actually. But it makes sense, guys in their 20′s are available and looking for a mate. Or at least testing the waters and are enthusiastic about dating. They are fun to be with but I simply can’t take being dumped or treated less then b/c of my age. Very few men in their 20′s/ early 30′s can handle being with an older women no less have a committed, relationship with an older woman. Yes, the number of men my age that are available are slim but I still think it is better to wait and try and find someone who I can relate to. Life is not Hollywood and you can save yourself a world of hurt by being smart.

October 4, 2011 at 12:59 pm
(77) DAna says:

Very well explained. Thank you, this is exactly how I feel. Im 38 but look 28, however would never put myself in that situation. Its a risk…dating a younger man. Im talking about more than 5years difference.

June 24, 2009 at 3:00 am
(78) Coco says:

I’m 21, and I’m thinking of dating a guy who’s “born a year after I was”, why that’s in quotes is because he’s 4 months younger (I’m born in the wintertime). I’m just not sure whether I should date him since I’ve always wanted a guy who’s older than me (ie so he can be more mature than I am and take care of me). In fact, my parents don’t want me to have a younger boyfriend. The thing is the guy is really attractive to me, he always sends me these cute sms, always compliments how cute I am, and the thing I really love is he’s really smart and has a bright future. I’m really happy when I see him, but the thought of me being younger just makes me worry…I’m afraid his friends or my friends will find us unmatched, since I’m older… What should I do?

June 30, 2009 at 3:33 am
(79) California Girl says:

I just turned 46 years old and have recently started dating a younger man (35). Iím physically fit and look about 10 years younger and everyone I meet practically wants to see my ID to verify my age.

I was married for 20 years and my husband was only 5 years older than me. I have never dated a man younger than myself. So far things are going good. He has one school daughter in a different state and no desire to have any additional children and I have teenage children. He owns his own home, is financially stable and has a great job.

He is very passionate and loves kissing on me from head to toe. We are compatible in every way and I have no trouble satisfying him or keeping up with him. We donít argue at all and like many of the same things. He has a perfect body and has always been attracted to older women.

I have met some of his friends and have been accepted well by them. Several of them might have older wives and girl friends (but itís hard to tell). In addition, he has met several of my friends and blended in well with them.

The issue I have is he just invited me to a picnic at his parent house for the 4th of July and I not sure what to do about that. I do know his parents are in about the same age bracket as my parents. I am terrified they might think Iím too old for himÖÖ Please Help!!!

July 6, 2009 at 9:45 pm
(80) Chris says:

I’m an older woman and, unfortunately, am only attracted to younger men. The age difference in and off itself should not be a deterent if you’re interested in someone but there are some things to consider.

Are you self-confident and comfortable with yourself? If not, the situation can easily increase how critically you view yourself and lead to lower self-esteem and acceptance.

Are you a planner and very reliable? Then watch out again. Guys, especially in their early 20′s, may have a very difference sense of getting together than you do and think nothing of changing plans on short notice because their lives don’t require some of the logistical matters that a working woman with a home and possibly children would have to deal with.

All that having been said, younger guys (for all the immaturity) still have an energy and forward focus that can be very attractive and stimulating.

July 10, 2009 at 4:42 pm
(81) Lisa says:

I am 49 & I have been dating a 25 year old for the last 8 months.We have lived together the last 4 months & everything is great, so great. I say go for it.

July 13, 2009 at 2:18 am
(82) Lollie says:

From my experience, I would say that even though you may be compatible, you are probably in different stages of life. So enjoy yourself but be careful. He probably won’t want to commit or settle down for a while and is still doing all that stuff that 20-somethings need to do. And you’ve already done it.

July 16, 2009 at 9:37 am
(83) Victoria says:

I think this is great. I had no idea there were so many women dating younger men. I’m 39 and just started dating a man who is 22. I’ve really been struggling with the age difference. I’ve almost always dated men younger than me but by only a few years. When the 22 year old started persuing me I thought of every excuse possible for me not to get involved. “He’s too young. People will look down on us. He’ll get over the attraction and be on to the next one quickly…etc…”. So far he’s been one of the most attentive and caring men I’ve ever dated. He listens to me and seems to be genuinely interested in me and what makes me happy. I’ll just have to see how it goes.

July 17, 2009 at 3:45 am
(84) Echo says:

I am 37 dating a 20 year old. we just started dating and it has been great. The chemistry is amazing, as is the sex. We know we dont have a future together, but have committed ourselves to enjoying this while it lasts. I will never regret this relationship. It has added a lot of joy to my life and I will always cherish the memories we have and will make. I say enjoy the young men who are wise enough to love older women.

July 20, 2009 at 7:39 pm
(85) Dee says:

Hi Bonny,
I recently moved to Calgary because my younger bf (by 4 years and 4 months) is from here. We have been going out for 2 years this upcomming September. Dating a younger guy is very new to me because my last bf was actaully 5 years older than me. The werid thing is my much younger current guy is several years more mature!
Not everything is Sunshine and roses- I do have to deal with the disapproving reactions of people who voice their unwanted opinions…Its hurtful and I hate to admit it but I do lie about his age sometimes to advoid the akward responses I get. Recently I discovered his mother doesn’t like that I’m older and it all adds extra stress on a so-called “forbidden” relationship where the woman is older. After all- I guess the older woman in a mans life traditionally is his mother and only his mother.
Because I have been on my own for quite some time since leaving my own nest- I am quite mature when it comes to life experiences, finances, relationships and struggles.- This is something I was always prided in but since my new boyfriend came along I find myself regretting much of my past and maturity.
All in all- Me and my boyfriend love, trust and respect each other and I truely believe that is the core of any solid relationship. His friends are good with my age and I like his friends too- I focus on the good things and hope his mother’s mind will change and that other peoples opnions will diminish.
My advice is to have fun enjoy him and ignore rude responses- as best as you can.

July 22, 2009 at 2:22 pm
(86) Nicole says:

I am 28 about to be 29 and I am dating a 20 year old and have been for about 4 months, at first I had it in mind that it would be just for fun, what could he possibly want with a single mother who was older? Well things quickly went fast and I am sooo happy with him. His career is jumping off now, he wants a family and has treated me better than anyone else I have ever been with. He is aware of the responsibilities he has taken on. I feel we are at the same stage in life, and our priorities are identical.

July 27, 2009 at 4:19 pm
(87) Darlene says:

I met someone who just turned 20 and I am almost 26. It seems like all these posts that it shouldn’t matter if our hearts are in it and i am happy. However, I just don’t know if i can get over the age difference. I mean he can’t even get into bars yet and I am at the age where thats all my friends and I do. Any advise?

August 5, 2009 at 4:42 am
(88) Dolefullyme says:

I am 33 and is seeing a guy 8 years younger than myself. He is extremely sweet and cute although a tad immature and insensible at times. Nevertheless, he is able to change and learn faster than my older guys and i will say, all in all, age is not critical unless u mind how pp see u

August 9, 2009 at 1:35 am
(89) Angel says:

Wow, I never thought I’d find so many women dating younger guys. I am 32 and married to a 22 year old for about 3 years now. In my last relationship he was 10 years older than me. Truth is, what age is the RIGHT age to be married or to have a relationship with anyways? My 22 year old hubbieís got a wonderful career, we just bought our first house and are still in love.

There are days when I feel a little more self contious, (this is not me at all) for example, when he compliments younger women or anything of that sort. Iím noticing that it bothers me. Whatís strange is when I was married to the older guy, this sort of thing never bothered me at all. As time goes by, I realize that itís not him, but me that is feeling the getting older pressure, so what Iíve done to remedy this problem is I pretend heís my age, some days I vice versa and pretend Iím his age. We have a lot of fun with this and I realize that I get less self contious when Iím in this mindset. Make your age difference work for you, not against you.

I must say, when you are with a younger person whether it be man to woman or woman to man, you feel a bit powerful, or might I say empowered. I say go for it, a little self empowerment is never bad. You are a hot mama which is why heís with you, if not him, it would probably be some other young hot thing in your life anyway. What can I say, maybe some of us older women just look fabulously young for your age, and you canít blame the young hotties for looking.

August 18, 2009 at 11:03 pm
(90) laticia says:

Hello Ladies!
I am totally stressed about dating a younger guy. I meet a guy while hanging out with my girls. I found him very attractive and interesting. We actually met after the party and sat and talked at a diner until about 4am. Yes, it was killing me I was dead tired. LOL We really hit if off, however I was taken back by his age, as I am 35 and he is 25. I found myself lying about his age to my sister. I am kind of embarrassed by his age. The friend has totally taken off, we have spent nearly every other day together since we met it has been over a month now. My issue, I was recently cheated on by an younger guy and really just dont want to have a casual relationship. The new guy and I spend a great deal of time together, I stay at his place, as I don’t allow him to stay with me as I have children. It bothers him and I know he doesnt understand as he gets all pissed about it. The communication is great at time and then there are time it’s hit or miss.

My issue is with alot of his self behavior, he wants me to stay over however, had a problem with me leavin stuff there. He of course he changed my leaving things, but now it’s the following, he questions, my motivates, my texting other people, he is selfish with affection now that we are having sex. He use hug and kiss me all the time, its like he wont touch me useless we are having sex, ever now and then he will slap me on the butt which is cute, but why the dramatic changes? He doesn’t like to be touch while we sleep, but always wants me to stay the night. The major issue I have is now that I do stay over at least 3 days or more during the week, when I get up in the morning he doesn’t even acknowledge that I am leaving and it bothers me to know end. When I brought it up to him he said I was being very emotional. I was a bit offended.

I care about this guy but wonder could I really have a future with this man that is only 25 with no kids, and my 35 with 2kids, 16 and 3. I would like to build something with him, but feel really stupid thinking it could be more then what it is and found my self wanted to leave to spear myself of the heartbreak. The thought of having my heart broke again scares me. :( Please can any of you ladies offer any words of wisdom. Thanks so much in advance.

August 21, 2009 at 11:59 pm
(91) Joy says:

I am 45 years old and fat and unattractive to men and yet I am really attracted to much younger men (like in their 20′s). I feel terrible and frustrated. No men are interested, much less the younger ones. It really hurts. I want to die I am so sexually frustated. There is something about really young men, they are just gorgeous and full of life.

May 16, 2011 at 12:38 am
(92) Nikia says:

The older we are the more important it is that we exercise–for health if for no other reasons. If you just keep the same activity level each year, you will simply gain weight due to slower metabolism.

I recommend something like Crossfit–you might have to work your way up to it, but it’s incredibly efficient for taking weight off, and great place to meet people, a bit more men than women. The truth is, losing weight is more about what you eat, but somehow the regular intense exercise made me want to eat differently, plus less time to eat :-)

August 27, 2009 at 11:41 am
(93) Proceed with Caution says:

I (28) have been dating my boyfriend (25) for almost four years now. In the beginning, I was reluctant to date him because of our age difference. He assured me that it meant nothing to him, and we’ve had great times together. However, now I feel that I am ready to move to the next phase of my life (marriage, children, etc.) Now he is using our age difference as an excuse to not move to that next level. Actually, he has gotten worse…partying like he is still in college and being lazy about his career. It’s incredibly frustrating and sad to me. I’m not saying that older women can’t have successful relationships with younger men–but you have to put double the effort into making it work. Just be careful and make sure that you are both on the same page…before you invest as much time as I have!

September 10, 2009 at 1:29 pm
(94) Anne says:

So… I love reading all this about older women dating younger men. I am actually going through a breakup right now with someone that is 10 years younger than me (I’m 33). I’m crushed!! But it happened to be about the priorities in his life… he’s not ready to be in a mature relationship. He lives at home in his parents basement, I have my own condo. He is in school for 4 more years, I have a degree and a stable corporate job… it’s just hard when 2 people are in different life stages. He said that he wanted a future and wanted to marry me, but, like a lot of previous posts said, he just wasn’t ready and still has a lot of growing up to do. I feel like in 4 years if we got married, he would leave anyway because he never got the chance to “explore life” with me being 37. No way can I have that!

Good luck to everyone and I hope it works out better than my situation! It’s super hard and I’m sad but I know it’s probably for the best.

January 3, 2010 at 8:16 pm
(95) Diane says:

Last year I dated a man of 33 and I was 65. We dated for a year. I just broke it off with him on Dec. 17th, 2009. During that time, he was like a water faucet running hot and cold. He had issues from the beginning, which grew only more intense as we saw each other. I made excuse after excuse for him to no avail. Now, this was with him, but not all younger men are like this. I also dated a younger man (11 yrs. younger than me) several years back and he was absolutely wonderful. I prefer younger men, due to the fact I act and look much younger than what I am. I do not think old and never will, but at the same time, I will not act like a teeny bopper. I belong to a dating site, Cougared.com, from which many, many younger men have contacted me, way too young, in their teens and 20s., so I think I will get off that site. Younger is great, but just make sure he has no issues from the beginning. This will avoid many nights of being alone and crying. Take to heart, every word he says to you and you will almost immediately know if he is sincere or not. I was blinded by love, next time will be different, for now I know what to look for. Good luck.

January 10, 2010 at 12:13 am
(96) Fonny says:

I am a 49 year old women and recently dated a 29 year old and then a 28 year old. The 28 year old is inside my head, I cant stop thinking about him, but I know he and I are in different places in our lives.
I have 3 children and 4 grandchildren, he is aware of all this as he is friends with my daughter, her partner and her children. I would love to have a relationship with him for as long as it will last. But I dont think my dauhter will accept it.
Oh well at least I have the memories and maybe oneday we will see each other some more.
I am glad there are other older women involved with much younger men and its working for them. It gives me hope and stops me from being so self conscious about it.

Best wishes to all

January 11, 2010 at 8:45 pm
(97) Jane says:

I dated a guy for over a year who was 26 when we met and I was 48. It was amazing… but I realized I couldnt ever give him the things he deserves. A family, children…. I truly loved being with him . We are still crazy about one another but reality tells us it will never work.. it is sad, but we are trying to keep the friendship we have.

January 21, 2010 at 2:40 am
(98) maxwell says:

Hi there,

Some advise from a guy who thinks he has something to add to this discussion.

I think most of you have the biggest problem with the ‘might be difference in maturity’ According to psycolegist

January 21, 2010 at 2:43 am
(99) maxwell says:

wrong button.

let me finish: (and rephrase)

… psychological studies, guys come to maturity between the age of 22-24. So when you are a mature woman, maybe you would like to consider if this guy you are dating is there yet.

January 23, 2010 at 3:49 pm
(100) Barb Hicks says:

I was wondering if people think a 23 year difference is alot ? To Much ? Trust me I am new to this …………..I always dated much older if not the same age man, imagine my surprise ?

January 23, 2010 at 5:40 pm
(101) MM says:

This can be really good but really bad….

Younger guys can be fun but ust imagine going out with someone that finds skateboarding interesting and amazing and wants to go to frat parties while you are going to business gatherings and show biz shindigs. Beware of their immaturity – Try explaining what their job function actually is to others when you are working on a “business project” together. I had to put up with some of this. It was not apparent at first but things got rougher than expected after a while with a 15 year age difference with aguy that I dated, I am 40 and he is 25.

January 27, 2010 at 1:52 pm
(102) Mrs. brown-eyes says:

Im a 31yr. old woman married to a 28yr. old man that makes me happy. I love him and he loves me also.We met at a park and I aproached him,I knew god directed us toward each other. We both had been thru some things,but we did not let it stop us from being together. love has no bounderies.I did not care what others thought about the relationship,because their opinions did not matter.He is so caring and he invites me to go every where with him,he says i have nothing to hide.He is truely amazing.So now do you see why it does’nt matter. Love mrs. brown -eyes.

January 28, 2010 at 10:32 am
(103) MS. MC says:

Im 23, and have been close as a friend to a 19 year old guy. Due to some attraction we snog once. We got comfortable with each other that we are snog everytime we meet. At 1st i thought he was just having some fun out of this. But apparently now, he have made it clear that our relationship means more then just friends to him. He adores me.

Im not sure if this will work as Im have been working in a professional field for over 5 years and im starting our my own business soon, while he is still in school.

Im afraid im gonna hurt his fragile feelings.

However, i feel that the age difference is just a matter of figures. I have dated guys more then 7 years older then me. Some were far more immature then some 18 year olds. It comes down to what we want in the relationships we have.

If one is ready to start a family and get married then dating a teen or someone in his early 20′s might not go far. However if you’re like 30 or 40 and he is 5/10/15 years younger and want the same thing. I guess the age gap is not big deal.

At the end of the day we all want to feel love and have someone to love. There are no clear written rule that says it is wrong to date someone younger. And dont bother what ppl would say or think. Because they are not the one that is loving you like he is…

February 18, 2010 at 2:56 am
(104) hannah says:

it is my first time dating a younger man we do have great fun but when it comes to reality young boys are young boys they’re still immature although they act mature. i don’t know if i should continue on dating younger man.

February 26, 2010 at 12:46 am
(105) Kerrs says:

@Lane…Great Advice! And I love the campground reference, its perfect!

March 5, 2010 at 3:22 am
(106) tiare says:

I just atarted dating a guy who is 27 and I am 33. I am a widow and have 2 boys ages 11 and 13. I have always dated older men ( 10 years plus) because of their maturity and career stability. My children ddespised these older men and I cou;d never bring us together as a group for social events. My sons are avid surfer/skateboarder/snowboarder types. I felt like a rift was developing beteen myself and my children being that they have their own teen/preteen social agenda which was much different then my mature boyfriends over the past 10 years since my ex passed.

Now that I am dating a younger guy who has the same interests as my sons, I am closer to them. We take them surfing and to the skatepark. My guy isn’t into the”scene” of these sports but he ‘s good enough to catch my sons eyes.We hang out together as a couple and film the kids. his connection to my children comes naturally and I love it! he has not had a girlfriend in over 5 years and approached me with the concept of taking it to a bf gf level. He comes from a very close loving family andhis morals are in place. He’s tons of fun when we’re alone too!
I don’t think 5 years is a major gap but i have been through some serious emotional sht. in my 32 years. Because the aire between us is so fun and fresh I find that my emotional baggage isn’t even an issue. In fact I won’t let it come up and ruin the connection that we have. I am inspired to work on my issues on my own rather than put them on him….which would obviously be too heavy.
He is amazing! Walked into my house and loaded my dishwasher without me asking earlier today meanwhile I was conducting biz. He is a pilot…already has his career which I think is huge! I need the security of KNOWING that the man I’m into has found his purpose and is living and loving it. That is what I find truly attractive. The age is circumstantial.

March 6, 2010 at 1:12 am
(107) c anne says:

I am 48, and have been dating a 33 yr old guy. When we met, he was funny and joking, and did not seem to be carrying around a lot of baggage, or try to control me (which is what I run into with men my own age/older)

He was open to getting together, but we are friends, mainly. I know that and I do feel to be serious, it might be an issue with about a 15 yr age difference. I can tell in some things we are at slightly different stages of life. However he is funny and fun to be with.

Meeting him did get me out of the thinking that I had to be with an older or same age guy; now 10 yrs would not bother me at all and pretty much feel normal. I had the idea that for women, it was different than for men to date younger, but I say it’s all a cultural trap, that only men can date younger but not women. Women should go for it, if they want!

April 6, 2010 at 12:52 am
(108) Athena says:

Help!
For the first time in my life, I am genuinely startled to find myself sexually attracted to a newly-minted 19yr old guy…and I’m 50! I’ve never been married, no children,and been bopping around the world for most of my life– but this took me by surprise,to say the least. I (think) he’s showing signs of interest, but I really don’t know how to proceed; I have no wish to be laughed at if I bring the subject up to him. Ideas, anyone?

April 7, 2010 at 9:50 am
(109) EU says:

So I am 32 going to 33. He is 25 going to be 26. We have been dating for about 3 weeks. He is very smart and mature for his age. There is a strong sexual attraction but I am very hesitate about treating this relationship too serious. I try not to call him often. I try to wait until he calls me before calling him or as the young people like to do, text! Which he does a whole lot of! I have a MA degree and completely independent and live on my own. He is just starting to discover what he wants to do for the rest of his life. I feel that it is risky, in the sense that I know he not going to be ready any time soon to settle down and have children. I on the other hand have been family ready for at least 2 years now. However, I planning on riding this through for at least 1/2 year to 1 year before thinking about future with this guy. Thinking this way helps me not making any assumptions about the relationship. Good luck ladies.

April 7, 2010 at 1:39 pm
(110) Erin says:

I wish we could all get on a forum and talk. I think women who date younger could use the support from each other. I am 42 and am insanely attracted to a 19 year old. He rocks my world, and he does not care at all about age but I get anxiety over it. Why can men do this with no problem but when it comes to women we put so much pressure on ourselves. It is just not fair. Again – I hate that men can do it but women get that judgement.

April 7, 2010 at 2:55 pm
(111) Michelle says:

Hello!
Thank you for this. I have always dated older. I am divorced 3 years and he was 13 and a half years older and horribly controlling and jealous. I ended up in a women’s refuge because of domestic violence.
I had one bad 3 month relationship since then with a guy my age. Now, a year later, I find myself suddenly dating a guy 10 years younger (he 27, i almost 37). Well… he treats me great and the chemistry is off the scale. Although he still lives with his parents and 3 siblings. He is the oldest. He also has no car and is bad with his money! These things can change of course and are not too important to me, but I don’t want to be taken for granted. I don’t feel he is doing that but I worry it may happen. Also I agree it depends on the guy’s maturity, he has little emotional baggage and helps me forget mine! He is able to have a “relationship conversation” and wanted me to be his girlfriens. He joked he is not ready for children yet but he muct know I am at a an age… I am not ready quite yet. I think I will give it six months and then have the serious chat. As my eggs are not getting any younger! All my friends say go for it, I am happy and not hurting anyone, that is what matters.
:-)

April 9, 2010 at 11:28 pm
(112) eu says:

Jen you are right. the last guy I was with was older, although just by 4 years ( he was 36 going to be 37) and he was not together at all! Had no sense of responsibility and lived in a dream world. When I first met him he made sound as thought he was helping his mother as oppose to reality where his mother was still helping him! I would not have minded being with someone that didnt know how to pay bills or fix his credit score. I would have not minded being the one taking care of that stuff. When I met him he was in the process of finding a job. However, 2 months into his job and with a little bit of cash in his pocket he was quick to make new friends behind my back, new female friends! He threw a big tantrum when I confronted him about it. Simply put, what I have come to discover is that men who are not occupying themselves with planning a comfortable future ( e.g. 401 k, vacations, health insurance) are probably spending their spare time looking around to get their satisfactions in life in other places! We all need attention in life but some men have a hard time drawing a line for the sake of a meaningful relationship. So watch out for that ladies.

April 22, 2010 at 1:17 am
(113) Jen says:

Almost ALL my significant relationships of the last 20 years have been with men younger than myself. Some have been men who stepped up to the plate and did what had to be done, and some were narcissistic little boys who couldn’t handle reality. I am in a relationship with a man right now who is 24 years younger than me, and it’s only been for 8 weeks or so, but so far it is sweet and passionate and tender. I have rarely been so moved in my heart, body, or mind, by any man, regardless of the age, as I am with him. I don’t need a man to provide for me. I need a man to love me for who I am, fill my heart, light up my life with passion, who listens to me and believes I’m beautiful. He is 35 and I am 59. I look and act 10-15 years younger than my age and he looks/acts around 10. So we kind of meet in the middle. You fall in love with the spirit inside, not the chronological age of the body it happens to ride around in. A couple of years ago a 19 year old young man asked me for a special night with him, for his birthday. It was powerful and vulnerable for both of us, other than that I had to teach him everything (not a bad thing, at that). That was one that ended up being the bratty teenager he still was, so it didn’t fly for long. BUT, I have been with men 5-30 years older than I, who were STILL bratty teenagers when they didn’t get what they wanted. Honestly, I find most men my age to be OLD. And most of the ones who aren’t, are so busy proving they aren’t, that they’re hyper-macho and hyper-athletic and hyper-sexual, and it’s a hyper-turnoff. I’ve found very few men my age who are young at heart, down to earth, who have dealt with their issues and face life with dignity, grace, and humor. The few men there ARE, like that, are gems. So don’t worry about a number on the calendar. Let people talk. In the end it’s YOU who has to decide what is right for your own life.

April 27, 2010 at 2:55 pm
(114) connie says:

I believe there is a big difference, it just depends on how much you are willing to put up with. I am 46, divorced and have 2 adult daughters. I am independent, strong and know what i want by now. I was dating a guy 12 yrs younger and as much as we got along and loved eachother he still had a whole life ahead of him. I left him and I am miserable, but i believe in my heart i did the right thing. He had never been married nor does he have kids. Staying with me would have deprived him of all these things, not to say that marriage and kids are the most important, but who am I to keep him from that?

May 25, 2010 at 2:49 pm
(115) JACKIE says:

TAMI #9 GOT IT RIGHT! 4GET THE AGE DIFFERENCE, THATS SECONDARY. HE’S ATTRACTED TO YOU RIGHT? FIND OUT WHY. IS IT JUST PHYSICAL (YOU KNOW, BOOTY FOR THE NIGHT)? GET TO KNOW WHO IS THE PERSON INSIDE AND IF THEY VALUE YOU AND NOT WHAT YOU HAVE. THAT’S WHERE TAMI GOT IT RIGHT, “IT’S HOW THEY TREAT YOU AND MAKE YOU FEEL (INSIDE AND OUT GIRLZ). YEAH THERE’S STILL A FEW GOOD LIL BOYS OUT THERE AND THEY CAN ACCOMPLISH ANYTHING, AND BE JUST AS RESPONSIBLE OR MORE THAN THE OLD FART WITH A MINIMUM WAGE JOB AND PROBABLY ON CHILD SUPPORT AND EXPECTS YOU TO BE HIS COOK, MAID, AND SERVANT AND OH YEAH ALL OF THIS AND STILL HOLD DOWN A FULL-TIME JOB TO HELP HIM CAUSE HE HAS TO PAY HIS CAR OR SUV TITLE AND ALWAYS HAVE BOOOZE AVAILABLE FOR HIM AND HIS BUDDIES…DON’T 4GET THE BOOTY SERVICE WETHER PROVIDED BY YOU OR SOMEOTHER BOOTY AWAY FROM HOME…WITH OR WITHOUT YOUR CONSENT. I DON’T THINK SO GIRLZ. TAKE THE YOUNGSTER THAT PAMPERS YOU, COMFORTS YOU, IS HAPPY MAKING YOU HAPPY AND KEEPS YOUR BEST INTEREST AT HEART. ABOUT THE JOB…REMEMBER HE’S YOUNG AND CAN STILL CLIMB THAT LATTER OF SUCCESS WITH YOU RIGHT BY HIS SIDE. AND ALL THAT ENERGY YOU GUYS CAN ENJOY TOGETHER…TO BE CONTINUED…….

June 22, 2010 at 3:08 am
(116) Vic says:

Glad to see not the only one in this situation. Going to be 50 this yr, he is 32 & started out as my best friend. This was a “service” arrangement to start with but he’s wormed his way into my heart as he says I have his. He has a gf, a user, too immature for him. Maybe he’s finally seeing that, maybe just playing me, but I’ll ride this out cause I’ve never felt with anybody what I do with him. Always thought young guys didn’t have the knowledge (had to eat my words there). Happily ever after? I doubt it but the ride is worth it. Go for it girls. Life is too damn short!!!!!

July 22, 2010 at 11:58 am
(117) saf says:

I was dating a guy who was 4 years younger to me (22), I first met him when he was 16 years old, he was my little baby, we’ve always had a special bond between us, eventually we started dating. We started off great, He made me feel young, needed, wanted, and loved. But then it happened, he started realising what he REALLY wanted and those were his ‘ desires ‘ . Younger girls about his age, he got his driving license, his ‘ daddy bought him a car ‘ , his friends out of no where started showing up, all the thins he never really had, popped up outta no where. I do not blame him for wanting what pleases him, all the materialistic things, but that just left me hanging. I felt neglected, unwanted, and more over unloved.But the biggest mess up was, he started messing around behind my back after I left the country. I’m still nuts about this guy, I have always been, I wanted to settle down with him, obviously, when his time and my time was right. It’s just so sad, to know eventually they know that being committed is the last thing they want. The chick he’s seeing now is nohing but his booty – call, I just hope and pray that this boy realizes that there still might be a future for us. Cause im upset as shit, people come and fill my ears with all sorts of things, I don’t wish or want to know about him (screwing this chick, that chick, ..basically getting physical with other girls). Lost and Confused

August 7, 2010 at 4:24 pm
(118) stephanie40 says:

hello, I am 40yr old woman, working alongside a 28yr old guy at work. He is funny,and lovely. I feel attracted to him, and I sense he likes me. I feel bad and wrong to feel this way, and their are moments of awkwardness/tension that are unbelievable. Lately I have not wanted to go to work at all. Any tips would be great
Steph

August 14, 2010 at 1:44 am
(119) Cheryl says:

Stephanie40, you just have to go with the flow. I’m 40 yrs old also. Are you sitting down for this one? He is 24yrs. We crossed that line a few months ago. We are just friends right now. The funny thing we have so many things in common, unbelievable. I went back and forward for months, trying to figure out what I was going to do. The chemistry was so obvious. When he was away out of of the country he always contacted me. Never even thought anything of it. Until we went on our first outing. Then it finally hit me. I was attracted to a younger man. Like this can’t be happening. We made a group trip in June. We where roommates. I call to book the room. Guess what they ran out of doubles?. I ask him. Would you like your on separate room or would you like to share with me? You know he chose to stay with me. “He said I know you want bite”. The first night went good, just talked and talked until we fell asleep in each others arms. The next night was that night. I still remember on thing he said that was so cute. “Just kiss me”. We both chose to stay friends with extras. To see how it goes. No matter how the outcome of this situation comes out. We took the oath to stay friends.The best thing I realized for the past months. He treats me better than my older male friends. That totally took me by surprise.

August 26, 2010 at 10:30 am
(120) kathy marvel says:

I have been in a relationship with a man 7 years younger for seven years he informed me two years ago that that is the longest ever for him , I found out he had lived with two other women both abit older than he, one year each. About a year and a half ago he started pinching my extra weighty parts and exclaiming I was too fat, then he started getting very aggressive with me and almost no affection next he needed money to supplement his income and rent and each month became hysterical the week his rent was due, with no chance for warmth from this actor, i decided to draw the line, he kept asking when i was getting my larger salary of the year and i told him i could not be sure, first ime i did not help him. Well surprise!!!!!!!!!! He decided to move back to his home town where he has lived in a friends house for over a year free of rent.H e changed his so called religion to impress someone his age or younger.. and ignored my operation after i took great care of his venis statia for years,, live and learn he seemed undone that i had trouble with my weight but i could not help it past 55 it just wouldnt shed this can be a big problem with even a sensitive guy but he was not all that . He always commented on my friends wrinkled faces and i happened to look good in that area but it is always something with a young narcissist BUYER BEWARE, i am out 10,000 to date.

September 7, 2010 at 1:44 am
(121) Alana says:

Wow I’m so glad there’s a place to talk about this! I’m 23 my boyfriend is 18 and so far its been the healthiest most fulfilling relationship I’ve ever been in, I’m just so scared hell leave me and ill be left in my late 20′s all alone! Also I’m glad I’m not the only one who is embarrassed by it, but screw everyone if you’re happy. Its fun right now too because he shows me off to his friends and I feel so good about myself but when I start looking older.. I’m worried about the next cute little things coming along. I wish I could just be at peace with it all. Any advice would be great.

September 28, 2010 at 1:27 am
(122) Embarssed says:

I i’ve know this guy for 2 years and never have thought of him in that “way” but we’ve gotten closer and just seem to click somehow I Like him a lot and he likes me back only problem is He’s two years younger which may not seem like a lot but when he’s 15 and your 17 it seems like a world apart i’m applying for collage and he’s preparing for testing yet i still like him what should i do

October 26, 2010 at 2:33 am
(123) Vickie says:

I’m 40 yrs old and bf is 25 today. I was married and now divorced with no children. I was very resistant about dating him, blew him off for a yr and thats when he found me again. My girlfriend talked me into just having fun with him. It is now 2yrs later and we live together. He treats me amazing and his family loves me. We are actually trying to have a baby.He wants to get married but i’m in no hurry. There is moments where i see the age diffrencs, but for the most part he is mature. He is a college graduate and is working, loves to go fishing and does not go out with his friends to bars. He say’s all he cares about in life is fishing, paying his bills and me is all he needs to be happy…I think if someone at any age doesn’t respect you or take you around his surroundings, he is just using you for fun and don’t put your heart into it..Everyone is very suppotive of us and is very happy for us.. we really don’t look that far apart in age, even tho it’s 15 yrs.. I’m treated like a queen and the most beatiful women in the world…Ae we all should be treated… Good luck and have fun, fun ,fun……

November 16, 2010 at 8:06 am
(124) Judi says:

I met a man 7 yeas ago that is 15 years younger than I am.We were together for 4 years and got married 3 years ago. We love each other and get along great! Ae is just a number.

November 28, 2010 at 6:33 pm
(125) used? says:

I am dating a 22 year old I am a 39 year old and everything is too good to be true He says I am his “girl” that he loves me etc etc we have been dating for several months he refers to us as a couple in a relationship but good intentions or not sex is not great down to once a month or once a week I am not dead. He acts like he doesn’t want sex or isn’t horny but I was just told he has been talking to a 23 year old about hooking up and messing around they IM all the time she told me and that he advertised he was horny on his IM that I am not even on to chat with him now I know why he never told me he had it . I’ve been with other younger men they seem attracted to me and I end up dating them this is different though because he says he wants to be with me but doesnt show it and now with what has been told to me I am trying to figure out what is wrong with me and why is this “boy” still with me?? obligation?? caring?? confusion??? not a great experience with a younger man this time around

January 3, 2011 at 10:24 pm
(126) here_I_go_again says:

I’m married to a man who is 33 and I am turning 39 next month. We have been married for almost 10 years and have an eight year old. Last year, he had an affair with a woman a year older than me. I still stuck with him- mostly for our child. However, now I am in the process of asking for a divorce. I have completed the paperwork and simply have to serve him. I told myself I would never date a younger man again. However, I am now completely attracted to a man at my work who is 32, and he seems to be attracted to me as well. We haven’t done anything, other than we eat lunch together everyday and there’s a ton of palpable chemistry. I won’t do anything until I have filed my papers. I am hoping I am not making yet another foolish mistake and wonder why it seems I can’t find a man my own age or a little older that I find attractive.

January 9, 2011 at 8:35 pm
(127) TancredsBabe says:

Wow! I have totally found this thread to be extremely helpful! Many thanks to all of you ladies who came forth and have shared your trials and tribulations in this situation :-) … The situations I find myself in are largely due to my work atmosphere as I am a bartender at a nightclub and a snowboarding instructor and ALWAYS surrounded by very young men, I’m in my mid 30′s, been married and divorced and have adult children and now, almost exclusively date men 21-24… yes they are very attractive but they’re also the only ones that ever ask me out! Haha… recently however, I have found myself in several cat n mouse games with 18 & 19yos who don’t take ‘no’ for an answer. Yes I think they’re very gorgeous n athletic n witty n charming but I do worry about the backlash in my small community. However after reading this thread and seeing how not alone I am in this issue I think ill finally stop running in circles and let myself be caught!!! I loved how one contributor said to raise em like I want em Hahaha, gotta love it! Thanks again ladies!

January 12, 2011 at 11:38 pm
(128) olivia says:

I have been dating a man 10 years younger then myself.
I am 34 and he is 24….I have always dated older men, my last was a doctor and was 20 yrs older.

the chemestry has been amazing since we met. he is lovely and open and kind, considerate…wants to help me with my business. Comes from a wonderful family, I feel like I have met the man of my dreams…but its wierd to wrap my head around the fact that he is 10 yrs younger. He treats me the way I treat him, its respecful and balanced. I am sooooooooooo happy
! cant remember feeling this fullfilled in a relationship…ever sad to say.

I realize that as long as you take care of yourself and you are both kind and respectful…its just like any other relationship. Plus so many men date women so much younger….like me with older men, and I never thought to question it then…why should we question it if it is the other way around?

Love being treated like a princess and adored!!! and love admiring someone that is a truly beautiful soul….super grateful for what the universe can bring your way!!! there are no social conditioned norms as far as the Universe manafests our dreams, just have to trust your heart and jump!!!!! life is to short to live in your fears and the idea’s and perceptions of others.

Age has nothing to do with it, its all heart and soul of the person. Plus youth is a beautiful thing, enjoy it for what it is…JUMP!!!!!

February 5, 2011 at 5:07 am
(129) jen says:

I am 24 and was dating a guy who has just turned 20. He lied about his age to me when we first met and I should have seen the lies from the start. I was his first and he lied about this to me as well. After a year, he said he was ready to settle down and hinted toward marriage in the near future. I have just finished uni and started full time work and he has just started uni. I want to save to buy a house and he felt it was unfair of him having to save when uni is supposed to be about fun. It all came down to priorities and he ended up getting scared. He told me the promises of marriage were to make me happy, not because he wanted it – he was so mature in some ways but in the end he couldnt handle having to grow up quicker for me. He said that if we were to stay together one of us would always be unhappy – me if i had to wait for marriage, kids, house or him if he was pressured to do it before he was ready. And he was right. In the end I felt like I wasted a year of my life. He really needed to go and experience life and grow up. Trust me girls you may think younger men are more mature and they are in some ways – but when it comes to getting serious about life – they really have a lot of growing up to do.

March 18, 2011 at 7:49 am
(130) Chanel says:

I’m 24, and like many have always dated much older men. My oldest bf was 32yrs older than i was- he was the perfect gentleman. I loved him…but he broke my heart. I then dated a guy who was 14yrs older than me…was good but he kept on telling me that i was too young etc. While i was in college i dated a 17year old. I was a senior and he was a freshman! omg, it was so funny- he persuaded me to, and i gave in. It didnt last, coz his friends were sooooo annoying and childish…and in the end so was he. I have been in casual dating relationships with a couple of guys who were between 2-4years younger than me. But now there’s a 20year old who’s been showing interest in me. Compared to me (graduated, living alone, working) he still lives at home, hasnt finished school and doesn’t have a “career”. I dont know what i’m going to do with him- because he can’t really give me anything material that i cant get for myself. But he is so attractive and hot (his body is to die for), so im going to go with the flow and see how things go. But i’m going into it with no expectations, lest i get disappointed.
I feel like a mini-cougar, and i like it! lol

March 20, 2011 at 11:19 am
(131) Joy In Heart says:

I read this thread months ago…I finally decided to contribute because we need to advocate this kind of dating, and open-mindedness in general! People need to know that love is love and it should be openly celebrated in all forms!

I’m 35 with an 18 yr old bf and I have to say, it’s been completely amazing!!! I look and feel young…people say I pass for 22. He is an old soul I think….he’s so calm and wise for his age. We meet in the middle somewhere, and we turn each other on so much (and on many levels!) It goes without saying that sexually, we’re *so* on the same page! Of course, there are many differences between us… in experiences mostly, but that’s part of what makes this so exciting and enriching. It’s by far the best relationship I’ve ever had! We take it one day at a time, live in the present, and bask in the joy this connection has brought to us!

April 12, 2011 at 10:29 pm
(132) SV26LOVER says:

OMG Joy in the Heart you are so right!!!
I am 43 and dating a wonderful, loving and caring 26 yr old and like you said it’s been completely amazing. He has loved me like no other man has or could twice his age. We have been seeing eachother for over a year and I can honestly say it has been the most incredible experience of my life in and out of the bedroom!!

May 1, 2011 at 8:53 pm
(133) Miss Thang says:

I am 27, soon to be 28. My new friend guy is 21, soon to be 22. He is mature for his age and sees no problem with dating older women as I am not the first. BUT I feel awkward because I have never dated younger and just got out of a twenty year age difference with another man. I dreaded it. So I’m trying something new but I’m scared he’s not ready for a real relationship like I am. He already has two kids and I have one. I like him a lot in the two weeks we have been seeing each other. I’m just ready to get married. Should I pursue this???

July 27, 2011 at 12:12 pm
(134) Abbey says:

I wonder if you should look at why you just want to get married?
If you just got out of a long term relationship, maybe it’s time you took a period of time out to reaquaint yourself with.. yourself! Marriage isn’t about just wanting to get married, it’s about finding the perfect person who you know.. through the thick and thin.. will be the one you want to be with for the rest of your life. And I think it takes a good few years to really determine that when you’re with someone.
If I were you I’d take your time and go slowly.. rushing into things is never a good idea. Try to let things progress naturally.. and just have fun! Forcing things can lead to trouble, and can make partners feel smothered.
If he’s got 2 kids then he definitely has the potential for commitment,, but it depends how it ended and whether it scared him off or not. If you’re still together in a few months maybe ask him then. If you’re not compatible in that way.. not much time lost! If he’s new- ask him now and you could likely scare him off!
I’m currently dating a guy 6 years my junior.. and it’s new too, only a few months in. Things pop up and give you indications of what it’s like to be with someone not as progressed or mature as you. And how you react/analyse those situations and compare them with the way they support you and give you their love will constantly help you figure out what’s most important, and if it’s going to work years down the track.
Good luck! xo

June 15, 2011 at 1:10 pm
(135) Melissa says:

I just turned 28 and I work with a guy who is 19. We would hang out everyday. ride our bikes, play video games, and go fishing. Many of my friends joke that I’m a 12yr old boy. We never had more interest in each other, other than pal’n around. Then it just sorta happened.. we just love being together and he asked me to be his girlfriend. I love it.. the sex is great, the conversations are great.. can this be wrong??

June 19, 2011 at 9:49 pm
(136) carrie1 says:

I am 56 and look 40, I am dating a guy 41 and from reading all the comments, know that this is foolish on my part. Haven’t met his family, friends. ALthough he insists he is not embarrassed by our relationship, I do not believe this is the case. The signs are there and my gut feeling is that I need to get out of this. I do not feel attactive when I am around him, and not that he doesnt try to make me feel good. So now I know what to do. It feels liberating to be able to type this. Ta, ta, Pat.

June 29, 2011 at 2:01 pm
(137) kyliebling says:

I am 50 now and in a relationship with someone that is 37 yrs old. I have done this before and I will have to admit these types of relationships don’t normally last, once there is any slowing down the man usually starts looking and the relationship seems to break apart. However this relationship that I am presently in is with a beautiful man with a heart of gold, I think he sees me as a woman that will return his love for what it is and not want anything more. I make more money, have a fuller life than he has ever had. I think he sees me as being stable and its comforting to him. He is a fast food manager and I am an nurse we both have kids but his are still young and mine are all grown. I dont look fifty or act it.. and I feel we have a connection that both of us were desperately looking for and now we both have found..

July 1, 2011 at 11:49 pm
(138) butterfly says:

I am 42 and my boyfriend is 27, we met at work and now living together for a year and a half, everything is good so far, he tells me he loves me all the time and I do know that i love him too, But sometimes it bothers me that he might find someone younger and just dump me for her, that would just devastate me. Our relationship is great because he is mature and he cares for me. He would do anything for me. We’re always flirting and we just have a good time with each other, but Im always scared that he would find someone younger and just leave… help…

July 8, 2011 at 2:14 pm
(139) Julie says:

Maybe your fear, and not the age difference, is your problem. You’re scared he might want to date someone his own age. But it might as well be any other fear, would you have lived with some one else (his own race, his own profession, his own anything etc). Your fear could scare him away indeed. So, love life, enjoy everything, create your own life, do things for yourself, be emotionally independent. Try it, and you will succeed.

August 1, 2011 at 12:38 am
(140) lar says:

Ok
I have never even dated a guy even 1 year youger than me, yet I have fallen for a co-worker who is 15 years younger….here are the problems
1) I am divorced with 3 kids
2) he is never married and lives with his parents!
3) We are of different races My being caucasian and him asian -american
4) I am his superior at work!
Does that even matter if I care about him?
He has brightened my life for the positive and I cannot imagine my life without him in it. He intoxicates me, unlike any other..THe mere smell of him draws my to near orgasm!

August 3, 2011 at 11:11 pm
(141) NotSoUglyBetty says:

Girl, you got a problem. I see three problems
1. He lives with bis parents
2. He lives with his parents
3. He lives with his parents

I had a similar situation and ended up with another child (34 yo) to look after.

Find yourself a real man, and forget Mama’s boy

August 7, 2011 at 5:50 am
(142) Realist says:

What i see from reading these comments is how deluded most of you are. How many posts are there saying things like “I am 53 but look 15 years younger”
No you dont, although good living and good genes vs bad living and bad genes might make you look as much as 5 years different, so at 53 you could appear to be anything from 48-58, you dont look 38.
There may be many reasons why people want to be with a partner who is vastly different in age. The younger partner may be trading off being with someone their own age for financial reward, stability, less sexual demands, a passport, lots of things.
But be realistic about what is happening to you. If you meet a 25 year old from the third world while on holiday and he finds you irresistable despite you being double his age, you need to take it for what it is.
All those of you saying to yourself “Ok I am 50 but i look so much younger so it isnt at all odd to go out with someone 20 years younger than me”, try to think about going out with someone 20 years older than you. How many 70 year olds do you want to date. Are you really that exceptional that your aging is different than other peoples?
What about the issue of children. How many relationships are going to be permanent if one person is too old (or too crabby in the case of older men) to be able to have or cope with children but the other is not.
Few relationships with a greater than a 5 year age gap work. Thats the statistics not me being judgemental. Ok thats stats and each one of you is a person not an average, but hey stop kdiing yourselves folks, not one of you looks 20 years younger than you really are. Not even movie stars with all the money and the good looks and good genes and good plastic surgery can manage that without some serious photoshopping.

September 1, 2011 at 3:24 am
(143) Undecided says:

Hello,

I am 33 yrs old. I have been friends with a man who is now about to turn 25. We have been great friends for 3 years. He has had one relationship that I know of. Just graduated college, took a job,is figuring out his goals, but doesnt have alot of life experience. Is living at home at the moment but working on getting out on his own. His first preference wasnt to live at home after graduating. I have a lot of emotional baggage, no children, no previous marriages. He was raised rather priveleged compared to me. He doesnt know what its like to struggle in any way. However, I can talk to him about anything at all. I can express myself to him more than I have ever been able to any other person. He listens. He tries to understand. We can discuss anything and everything and talk through things. He is intelligent and funny. Age is a big thing to me but this year I have finally admitted to myself that I am crazy about him. I dont know if he feels the same, it seems like he does most of the time, but sometimes I am not sure. I think age is a big thing for him too. But we grow closer and closer and closer. We spend every day together as friends. Our religion differences are HUGE. In everything else he is just exactly what I need and he doesnt mind my crazy emotional self. We just talk about everything and it works out. I worry that I am 8 yrs older. I worry that I may just be his buddy and will ruin our friendship if I try to take it to a different level. Or if I even seek out how he feels. I honestly dont know if he would know how to take it to another level truly lol. Anyway, Im undecided on what to do and I was curious if ppl thought I should just leave it be or try to pursue more. Thanks.

September 14, 2011 at 9:02 am
(144) Messed says:

I am 42 years old and one night paying poker and drinking with my son’s friends I had sex with the cute one. Well I lost a bet and the sake was whether we sleep together. I lost the bet and made good on it. It turned into a 3 month lone affair that ended in my belly swelling up. We really didn’t use protecting due to my dc. telling me that after my last one I won’t be having anymore. My ex-husband and I didn’t use anything for 13 years and he never pulled out. The 19 year father just couldn’t handle it at first but when he saw our little girl he just couldn’t say away. Our little girl just had her first b-day and all he wants to talk about is having an other one. I think that I want another one but I want to get married first. He is against marriages and just wants to live like we are. If I am going to have another I need to do it now. Sp should I have a baby with him with marriage ? I mean I already have one with him and I don’t think that I have the time to find, start and relationship, and have another baby. This guy tries every time we have sex to get me pregnant. Hell i could be pregnant now as I write this. I am not on any birth control and he pull the rubber off every change he gets
Thanks for listening
Stacy

October 1, 2011 at 5:40 am
(145) GuyGuy says:

This is for the REALIST,what is your problem.If these women say they feel and look younger than their age,who the hell are you to tell them they don’t.

November 25, 2011 at 2:46 am
(146) Heather says:

After reading so many comments, I find myself compelled to add to the mix. Like so many of you I met a younger man while separated from my husband. There is a 15 year difference. He pursued me incessantly, and I rejected his advances for a while; however, I couldn’t deny the physical and emotional attraction to him. After I finally agreed to go out with him, (with absolutely no expectations of it going any further)it turned out that we REALLY hit it off. And when I say really hit it off, I mean that we have been almost inseparable since we met and I guess that is the part that scares me. We started off so intense and that intensity hasn’t dwindled, yet I fear that it will due to the age difference and his lack of world experience that soon he will want to move on and experience life without me. However, I cannot deny the weird connections that we have.

We are not perfect, but we are willing to work things out as a couple. He is very forgiving, but I do notice his lack of maturity and remember myself at that age and can only laugh. Only one member of my family knows everything about our relationship, but the rest of family only knows that I am dating someone new, but definitely not his age. We are both hesitant to add that level of drama, nor do I know if there will even be any. I just want to enjoy every day and worry about the family aspect later. My marriage contained way to much drama and indifference, and this is first time I have been happy in a very long time. I honestly adore this man, and might even say that I have fallen in love with him.

I have tons of support from my close friends as they see it as we are two people who are extremely happy and feel that we should follow our hearts not our age.

So to those of you who have made it work, what is the secrect? How do you move forward? I am not saying marriage, I just mean how did you bridge the gaps? Was it a natural transition?

December 15, 2011 at 9:44 pm
(147) Darealischic says:

I am 31 and my boyfriend is 23, he initially approached me. I was skeptical because of the age difference although I’ve always attracted younger guys. I look a lot younger but I always feared a younger guy would leave me for a younger women. I love him so much and we have been together for over 6 months. So far its good and I feel that age isn’t the issue, all that matters is the chemistry you have with your partner. If you are compatible it will work, if your not it won’t….it is as simple as that,

December 20, 2011 at 9:35 am
(148) Cherub says:

Diane
Are you still with this guy? How is it going?

December 30, 2011 at 11:45 am
(149) Souf says:

Iam a guy dating a girl older than me, I am 20 and she is 37, we love each other so much, she means a lot to me and it is the same for her, we met online, and so far we cant spend a whole day without talking to each other, when iam with her, i am in bliss. Our relationship is really wonderful Hamdoullah, I did never think i will date an older girl, and she did never think she will date a younger man. This amazing relationship started almost 8 months ago, and it is really wonderful. I never regret being with her.

January 15, 2012 at 8:50 am
(150) Iris Darwin says:

Really appreciate you sharing this article post.Really looking forward to read more. Much obliged.

January 19, 2012 at 7:28 pm
(151) Getting Big says:

Well Let me tell You girls a little some thing. I was 42 and divorce after 17 years. My 16 year old daughter and I moved in to a three bed room apartment. Her 19 year old friend got kicked out of this house so we let him move in for a little while. Well after a little while my daughter started to have causal sex with him and encouraged me to get a little tension out with him. At first I was like NO WAY. Well one night they wanted me to film them doing it and so I did. It was so erotic. After that he walked around the apartment nude all the time. God did it turn me on. Well one monday morning I couldn’t take it anymore and we did it. Here is were it gets crazy. He got my daughter pregnant. He thought that I would send his to jail so he and my daughter hatched a plan to get me pregnant so that I would need him and not send him to jail. I sent my daughter to pick up my BC and she switched them with fake ones from the internet. After I missed the second period I new something was up. After I confirmed i was pregnant I told my daughter and thats when she told me she was pregnant. 4 months pregnant. My daughter gave birth at 17 and I at 43.
Its kinda weird that my grand son is brothers with my son. He is sleeping in my daughters room but we still have sex. He wants to get us pregnant again. My daughter is letting him and he is trying me. We will see.

February 1, 2012 at 7:23 pm
(152) the young guy says:

Hello to all the hot older ladies. I have been seeing a older lady. She is 42 and I am 24. She is now 7 months pregnant with my baby. She was a married fling that got pregnant. I think that she let me knock her to have a reason to leave or get kicked out by her husband. When we had sex she would tell me that its up to me to prevent her from getting pregnant. Well I was not pulling out and I thought that a chick this old is not going to let a guy young enough to be her kid get her pregnant. Well here we are. She is as big as a house and living in my apartment with no job. All i really wanted to do was have sex with her and her daughter.

February 20, 2012 at 5:56 pm
(153) steve says:

I have a weird relationship here. I was married to a pretty girl and we had a baby. She died in the 911 thing and I don’t want to talk about that. What I want to tell you is that after that happened I did not know what to do. I could not take care of this baby by myself. My mother in law had me move in so that she could help me with the baby. Well she is pregnant with our 3 child now and everything is great. She is due in about a month and they are going to do a C-cession due to her age. She is 48 and this baby was unplanned but will be loved just as much I am 34 and have no problem being with a woman that is 14 years older that me

February 24, 2012 at 1:21 pm
(154) MrsTowel says:

There are plenty of men out there with older women. My father is six years younger than my mother and they have three kids together. They have been together for about thirty years. My girlfriend is five years older then me and we have a two and half year old son together. I had just finished my BA and had been admitted to graduate school when he was born and my girlfriend was doing her MA when our son was born. I think that when you are finished with your university degree and begin working you enter a new life, were age becomes less important. I and my girlfriend met at the university. She had worked for a while after high school and then between her BA and her MA. She had never had a ďlong relationshipĒ. Iím on the other had just came out from a five years old relationship when we met. Iím on the other hand look very young and still have to show ID when I buy tobacco or liqueur. I just turned 27 and she will turn 32 this year.

A friend of mine just married a woman that is eight years older than him. He is 27 and she is 35. They have two years old together. They meet when he worked as a third officer (just out of merchant navy school) three-four years ago and she was a young successful executive. It was not their age that was the problem but him working at sea, so they decided he would work on ďlandĒ so they could have a normal life. Now he is in law school and takes care of their kid while she is making the ďbig doughĒ.

March 7, 2012 at 2:27 pm
(155) Liv says:

I am 23 and just started dating a 19, soon to be 20 year old man. I will be 24 in a month. Yeah I know the age difference is not that big but I have been getting a lot of s*** from my good girl friends about it. They insist it is a mistake because he is not settled or at a point where we could settle down. Little do they realize neither am I. I have usually dated men older than I though never past four years. That was the biggest gap for me. I enjoy dating a younger man. He doesn’t talk must about our distant future which is good for me because I like to do what I want when I want. He doesn’t ask me many questions or pressure me to try to alter my life to fit his. He is the sweetest and most caring man I have ever been with. Yeah he can be immature but so am I. He makes me feel pretty and special and he drives me to be a really good person. He believes in me more than any other man I have ever dated and I really love that. I believe in him as well. I enjoy it, after older man after older man a new young one is refreshing.

March 14, 2012 at 6:46 pm
(156) Karen says:

Kelly, I’d love an update. I feel the same as you do. I don’ t think I’ll ever get out of my mind that he could leave me fora younger woman- if not now in 5 years. I am getting a mediation to just enjoy it- as I write this!

But after Demi and Ashton- I man she is pretty secure in herself and she couldn’t even deal at some point.

March 25, 2012 at 12:46 am
(157) Lucy says:

I am reading all of women’s post here, and I try to find out what I should do. I just found out my boy friend is 42 and I am 52. He told me he is 50 when I met him. We have known each other for over a year, our relationship developed very slowly. He is a boss in his company, he also started his own business. He is very busy and doing great. His 2 kids already grew up. I have 2 boys 12, and 9. I am so sad that I am older than him. I never try to date a man that younger than me so many years, but now….He has most of things that a woman wants: young, have a good job, make good money, live nice house, drive expensive cars….. I think this is too good to be true for me, that is why I tried to stay away from him even I didn’t know his age, but he kept coming back to me… I love him but my heart tells me this doesn’t work. I think my family and my friends all will tell me leaving him and don’t waste time. But my heart is still with him. I believe he loves me too.

March 27, 2012 at 7:31 pm
(158) Vicky says:

I have read all the posts here. I am 42 and have a 25 year old boyfriend. He is trying to get me pregnant. He takes off the condom whenever I am not looking. I want another baby. My daughter is 6 months pregnant now and I don’t know. I miss taking care of babies. I just think that this guy will be gone and I will be left to take care of this baby by myself. My daughter is telling me to go for it. What will my friends say about me having a baby this old. What would they think of me getting knocked up by such a younger guy. Would people think about me having a half black baby. My daughter says not to worry about that stuff. And yes her boyfriend is black. These 2 guys are best friends. She would take her boyfriend to her room at the end of the night and leave me and this guy to watch porn together. Well you cant watch porn and then do nothing. So here I am. Should I let this younger guy put a bun in my oven or should I run and say that was close

March 28, 2012 at 7:18 pm
(159) Julia says:

Well this is all well and fun but what happens when the younger 20 something get the 40 something knocked up ? I am 47 and have a 4 year old with a guy that is now 29. We fell in love, I let him get me pregnant, and we broke up just like that. He dosn’t pay child support or even see our son like he is to. It turns out that he gets off on impregnating older women. I am #2 and #3 is expecting now. The bigger I got the less he wanted to do with me. 4 months after our baby was born he wanted another but I was done with having babies so he was done with me. I will not get involved with a younger guy even if there were only young guys.

March 28, 2012 at 7:25 pm
(160) aidni says:

I started dating a man 14 years younger than me a couple of months back. I am 40 and he is 26. I look really young for my age, and he looks a bit older than his age. Initially I resisted, not because of the age, but because he didn’t really have his sh*t together, and I didn’t feel the physical attraction that he did. However, much to both of our surprise we have found ourselves very much in love. While sometimes it becomes apparent to me that he is just starting his life while I am in the middle of mine, most of the time I feel I have found my soul mate. He wants a family, and so do I. Further, we want a family TOGETHER. We have many of the same interests and goals. I have found it much easier to get commitment, love, and affection from him than from many men my own age that I have dated mainly because they are too busy looking for 21 year olds!

April 7, 2012 at 1:23 am
(161) Aini Ann says:

Im 42 hving a serious relationship with a 30 year old wonderful man. Yes, there r differences n conflicts with views n opinion but above all, we love each other madly.

April 9, 2012 at 5:59 am
(162) jewellery says:

There are some interesting points in time in this article but I donÔŅĹt know if I see all of them middle to heart. There may be some validity but I’ll take maintain opinion till I look into it further. Good article , thanks and we would like extra! Added to FeedBurner as nicely

April 9, 2012 at 8:06 am
(163) isabel says:

To bekah..i relate totally wit u gurl..im 46 n my bf is 19 im 27 yrs older than him but he loves me nwe have a really gud relationship..we have so much in common n we think alike n we love doin things 2gether n we dnt care who sees us holdin hands n kissing..he is so proud 2b wit me as i am proud 2b wit him also..age is jus a number n sumtymes u jus gotta b patient n u will find ur soulmate lyke i found mine..love dnt cum i numbers..all i knw is he makes me happy n i cherish a our moments 2gether..and my kids are happy 4 me n they r older than him but as long as he makes me happy then my kids are happy 4 me also..

April 9, 2012 at 5:59 pm
(164) Robin says:

Don’t take the relationship serious, enjoy yourself and just have fun while it last, and then move on. A man 20 years your jr will find you interesting for a while, but soon he will want to caress the tight young body of a 20 something. Don’t let your feeling got involved, keep it light. Believe me, you will become tired and embarassed of younger women asking him if you are his mother….in front of you !

April 9, 2012 at 7:51 pm
(165) SImone says:

I am 41, newly divorced and now dating a 27 year old. Never thought I would, but he pursued me. I’m loving it. We have a lot in common, and a lot to learn from each other. Don’t let society’s stereotypes keep you from happiness!

April 11, 2012 at 12:43 am
(166) M says:

I have to say I disagree with dating a younger guy. Unless it’s like 2-3 years difference. Many people commented that they are dating a man that is 19 years old or in their twenties while they are close to 40.

First of all, at 19, they are still a kid. Secondly, if you could be their mother (16 + years older), then that’s sick and wrong. They most definately won’t stay with you for long, but aside from that, you have to realize that sleeping with them is wrong. They are practically a kid, not a man. Men nowadays don’t settle until they’re 30 so if you are dating a twenty year old, they won’t commit anytime soon. And if you aren’t looking for a commitment, then you are just using them. I hope you put more thought into it before you as a middle-aged mother date a kid (son).

P.S. I don’t mean to offend anyone, but I hope that if you are in this sort of situation, you think about it from their point of view. If you were 20, why would you date a 40 year old? Wouldn’t that be wrong?

April 11, 2012 at 5:17 pm
(167) Jessica says:

Im curious are any of you still with your men? Some of these responses are a couple years old. Am curious which if any have lasted. I’m 33 my boyfriend of over a year is 21.

April 12, 2012 at 12:36 am
(168) used says:

Younger men like all men suck!..they suck the life out of you…they use you for money…they cheat…they lie…and when they are done using you…they walk out without looking back…I dated a younger man for 10 years, he told me so many lies, wanted to marry me blah blah blah,,,long story short…he lost his job..I helped him out by using my credit cards….ran them up…he up and left me holding the debt..then I start getting calls from females claiming he was their boyfriend and met him online dating sites,,,promised the world…took their money and bailed out ….I was shocked to find out I was so played by this so called man/boy con artist…there should be a law against men who rip off females and lie online…..the internet is a sea of liars cheaters and freaks….I am sure there are many females who lie to guys as well…and for that I am sorry….I am a very kind and honest woman and try to give people the benefit of the doubt but after this relationship its very hard to want to date anyone ..Iam still struggling to pay off the credit card debt and could face having to sell my home because of what this man did! but I know his Karma will catch up to him and all the wrong he has done to people will come back to him. He is truely an evil soul for all the women he played…..

April 12, 2012 at 11:20 am
(169) KT says:

My situation is quite new. To me at least. I’m 36 years old, separated from my husband with 2 children (11 and 8). Two years ago I met a guy on an airplane who tried to kiss me. I was having none of it, but we became facebook friends and occasionally contacted each other. 4 months ago he realised I was back on the ‘dating’ scene and asked if we could meet up. He lives in a different country but visits mine regularly. We’ve now met several times and chat most nights online. I discovered after a while that he was only 25. I had assumed he was early 30s on account of his life experiences. I’m now battling a personal dilemma. Only recently have I started to physically age. I have the wrinkles forming beneath my eyes and the need to dye my hair on account of the greys appearing. People still say I look mid twenties, but for how long? I’m beginning to fall for this guy. Should I cut and run now so I don’t get hurt? Or should I risk the heartache and just enjoy the time I DO have with him, for however long that might be? I realise the easy ‘outsider’ answer is the latter….but what about my heart? And the ensuing ego crush?

April 16, 2012 at 9:19 am
(170) j says:

i am falling for a 17 year old when i am already 33 going on 34 next month. I think I am going mad, i really am, but i think those marry who they don’t love just because they are of the marriageable age are even madder. You make unhappy compromises with people you don’t intend to live with happily every after. You end up on the same bed for years with people you don’t even know really well, cos you were in such a hurry to get married. You don’t even feel connected but you have to start planning families with hopes that babies will connect you somehow, but eventually you just canít wait for divorce to disconnect you. I think its insane. I’d rather choose something that makes me happy, and someone who makes me happy, never mind what is going to happen in the future – growing old and wrinkled, unable to have babies, unable to meet his parents, unable to mix with his juvenile friends, etc. etc. Its been so long since I was in love, in fact I think that I have never been in love before, so I am just going to make every moment count, just because I love every moment when I am with him. That should be enough for two people to merely be in love with each other.

April 16, 2012 at 9:20 am
(171) j says:

I also realise that I don’t quite know what I am saying and at the same time, I am questioning, is this love, or am I just bored out of my brains that I can believe anything that makes my life more exciting? But, the heart has its own reasons that reason knows nothing of, so why not just make up some illogical reason so that you can follow your heart and give it some peace, instead of binding it with reason? Who knows, it may turn out to be a meaningful connection, a great friendship and even a love that is true and so rare that it may only appear once in your lifetime? As for me, my ‘illogical reason’ is, Try loving a younger guy – age is not a measure of maturity, an indication of the ticking biological clock, and at the very least, a joke for others at your expense. Age is a permission to do whatever you like (do it now or you may never get another chance at all), an ongoing discovery of ourselves (there is a part of me that never grows up and will never grow old), a challenge of convention (who knows, he loves your wrinkles more than you do). lll;) To all the women out there who are in love with younger men, no matter how much younger, don’t rush to be in love for fear of missing the boat, don’t hesitate anymore either just because you are not wrinkle free anymore, but take time to find out how right you are for each other. And if you love him, even if you have a feeling that it will not work out eventually, at least do tell him that you honestly love him now and see what happens! We have enough experience and wisdom at our age to go through setbacks to last through any heartbreak anyway. We also do not need every relationship to end up in marriage for us to be happy anyway. Have courage; pursue your desires and don’t let the clock stop us from going after what can be really good for our hearts!! (:

April 17, 2012 at 10:06 am
(172) Mels says:

For those who think dating a younger guy is NOT a good idea what do you make of a 6 year gap? Is that slightly too much? I’m 28 and my bf is 22 we got on really well and have great chemistry I just ant stop worrying that although he fancies me loads now when I get older he’ll want someone younger. Am I just being silly?

April 18, 2012 at 1:50 am
(173) shoshana says:

This is confusing. I’m 35 and am with a boy 25. I want children… can a bambino have a bambino? It feels unfair to him. Yet I want him and I think we are in love. He loves me… He’s so wonderful. It hurts. I’ve dated younger boys but more like 4-5 years which is no big deal. But ten feels hard, it would be different if I had children already. my biological clock is ticking and this poor guy is at my mercy.

April 20, 2012 at 9:27 pm
(174) NateNeo says:

Hey girls (seems like most of you commenting are women) I’m a guy, and I’m casually seeing a 33 year old and I’m 18. I met her a year and a half ago through her sister who is 28 and we clicked instantly, and I kept seeing her at events and gatherings and we would chat all night and it was amazing. 2 weeks ago I saw her at an event and we were chatting again, so i finally plucked up the courage to tell her that I love her company too much to never know when I will see her next, and she gave me her number. From then we texted constantly, since then we have met up twice, the second time resolving with us in bed together.. I’m pretty sure I have strong feelings for her, now that we have been close privately, but now I don’t know how to tell her.. I’m worried that if she knows I really like her, a lot, I will see her and talk to her less then when I did before, because if I’m honest, for me, she is the most amazing person I have ever met

April 21, 2012 at 2:29 am
(175) ambermerci says:

Hello all,
I’m turning 40 soon and I’m divorced with an 11 year old son. I’ve been single for 6 years and have dated a few people but without sex. Nothing has worked out. I’m very attractive and can pass for my 20s.
That being said, when the time comes I’m not judging anyone by their age.
I’m looking for a commited relationship not a romp in the hay “wham bam and thank u ma’am”
But I don’t judge anyone who dates younger.
I do think its wrong to date a teen or someone your kids age (if u have kids that age)
But other than that, who cares if you’re older by 20 years?
WATCH The movie HAROLD AND maude.
Its Excellent.
She’s 80. He’s in his 20s.

April 21, 2012 at 2:37 am
(176) 40yrs young says:

Dating/marrying a younger man isn’t wrong.
Men do it.
Why can’t we?
The only issue I have is when a woman dates someone their kids age or younger.
That’s weird to me.
But if you’ve never had kids then knock yourself out.
I’m 40 and my son is only 11, so if I wanted to date a 20 yr old I would. There’s women my age with 25 yr olds. (They were teen moms) well that sucks for them.
Ha ha
But not for me.
I think as a parent u should set limits and stay out of your kids dating pool.
The guy should be at least 10 years older than your kid.

April 21, 2012 at 2:42 am
(177) Liberty says:

Those of you who b*tch and complain about how a younger man turned out badly need reality checks.

All men are created equal.

Essentially this means there are good and bad men of every age group.

Would you judge all black men by a few?
Or white?

Age is the same as race.

Granted if someone is of legal age.

April 21, 2012 at 2:47 am
(178) marge says:

Reality check ladies!
Men are all horny pigs who want beautiful young sexy women.
So guess what?
Get with a man your age and the odds he will cheat are just as high as with a younger man.
Be yourself and be with who u want.
Age makes no difference

April 25, 2012 at 7:17 pm
(179) Mile says:

Well I an new to this. I am 40 year old woman. I have 2 grown children. I am divorced from there father for 5 years now. A little over a year ago I started to date a younger guy, much younger guy. John is 23, but much more mature that more guys his age. After a few dates we took our relationship to the next level. This is what made me fall so hard for him. The sex we have is the best sex I have ever had. The different positions, the size of him, and the new things we have done has just blown me away. He is the only guy that I have every had anal sex with and the way he dose it is unbelievable. We have been using the fertility awareness method (FAM), or an other way to say it is the pull out method. I don’t know if this is normal but when we are in the moment I feel compelled to have ( for a lack of better words ) bred me, You know get me pregnant. I know I don’t want anymore babies but I want him to get me pregnant. We I made the mistake od telling him about my feelings and the next time we made love, …..he did not pull out. As a matter of fact he has not pulled out since. So I am now 12 weeks pregnant. We are planning to get married next month. I am not giving birth single. In our future plans he wants three kids and I don’t know if I will be able to take that. I would like to hear from any women that had a baby with a younger guy and how it worked out. If you are still together and what. Thanks

May 1, 2012 at 2:10 pm
(180) angie says:

I recently meet a gentlemen who is 28, I am 45. I read Sharon’s comment taking her advise.I want to get to know this fine gentlemen! I do have children of my own 26,22,17 I hope there okay with this … I need to enjoy my life and be happy. :)

May 2, 2012 at 5:18 pm
(181) Jen says:

Casting Women Ages 45 – 90 in a relationship with a Much Younger Man

Now Casting!!!
Strong, independent women between the ages of 45-90 for an exciting new docu-series on a major cable network that proves that true love is ageless. This will be a lighthearted look into relationships that break the conventional mold. Like people, relationships come in all shapes, sizes and ages and we want to share that!

We want to hear your fun positive stories! How did you meet? What do your friends and children think of your mate? Has your daily routine changed since you two met?

If interested in sharing your story please submit the following info ASAP to reallifeharoldandmaude@gmail.com:

Names
Ages
City/State
Brief bio (paragraph or so that tells the story of your relationship and how your life has changed since you two met)
Contact #
Recent photo of the two of you

May 3, 2012 at 12:49 am
(182) caligil says:

this is so good fo me i am 39 he is 32 i love any thing when comes to the bed room tis is why i state dating dating him now i am lcky to get it 1 o 2 times a week not good is it me or me i think it is him i need it more…

May 4, 2012 at 1:58 am
(183) Joycek says:

Support you. It’s the younger man choosing to be with you because you are intelligent, sexy, secure in your own skin, open-minded… non-threatening. You welcome anything into your life that fulfills your needs as a woman… accepting and receiving pleasure as you wish, as you choose. And, it’s having the power and carnal knowledge to do so. It’s the attitude that you are worth any and every effort and deserve all you desire, anything you want.

The younger man, the Cub who prefers a mature lady… wants a woman with all these attributes. He knows all those things about you instantly and he gravitates towards all that you are… because you are who you are, because you know all there is to know about most things he cares about. You know how to entice him, enthrall him, enjoy him… please him. You know you are a Cougar… and, are totally and completely proud of it. Which one am I?

May 4, 2012 at 2:03 am
(184) Jkane says:

The younger man respects my independence, my enthusiasm, my “worldly” knowledge and is not intimidated by my confidence. Also, he is capable of keeping up with me in spirit, activity, my need for adventure and spontaneity… and anything else that comes to mind. In addition, rarely are they boring!

BTW, Here are some suggestion of dating younger men

May 7, 2012 at 2:00 pm
(185) anonymous 786 says:

hey everyone im dating a wonderful gul she is awesome she is really great but something im nt certain about she tells me how she likes me and how she misses me and cant wait to see me and wants to always be with me but there is a problem im in college she is working and got her own car her own place and im in college studing still she is 9 years older than me she is 27 and yes i you figured it out im 18. not to brag or anything lot of older women think i am very mature for my age.so my problem is do you guys think that her intention can be good or is just my imagination please anybody with some advice tel me what should i do you guys some like ul can give a brother some advice thanks for reading

May 9, 2012 at 4:55 pm
(186) hippiegirl says:

Go for it, have fun, depending on the situation…Just ended “seeing” a 39 yr. old guy (I’m 52)…He recently got spooked because he was having feeling for me, and he now realizes he wants kids…I find younger guys aren’t as judgmental, more honest, fun, and respectful…all, and all, it all depends on the guy.

May 10, 2012 at 6:55 pm
(187) Mike says:

Hello everyone. I just want to say, A couple of years ago when I was 22 I meet this very hot 43 year old woman that was an advertising saleswoman. I was buying a large amount of add space for the company that I work for. Well we had many meetings that ran late in the night. I think that she advanced me to move forward with the sell. We entered into a relationship that was great. We used BC most of the time but there were a lot of times were we used the pull out method. We had a close call. She was late but it turned out that she wasn’t pregnant. The thought of her pregnant with my baby really turned me on. So…. With out me asking her of talking about it, I decided to get her pregnant. My family did not like the ideal of our relationship at first but it worked out. My mother was mostly upset that I married a woman that is older than she is. My dad however likes her a lot. My wife and I get along great and we are working on our second baby. It does work with an older lady and a younger guy. Not all of us are retarded.

May 12, 2012 at 2:21 pm
(188) mary says:

i am currently dating a guy who is 6 years younger than me..i am 33 and his 27.i never dated younger men, it was always an older guy.we are dating for a month now, funny was we meet a day before he flew back to his country (US) to deal with divorce papers lodged by his 2nd wife!he knew that i am still married and have 2 kids back home(am an Asian) but he also knew that me & my husband were practically separated.i never imagine he will be interested with me,though i look younger than him, he knows my age and my status.at first he was so good and sweet, not after he bought his new sports car and started to be busy, barely see me or texted me..most of the time he is also mean and rude to me or other people.i dont know if its his age or his situation that makes him such or it is his personality.i am patiently hoping that he will change.

i dont if i really need to continue with him…

May 23, 2012 at 4:42 am
(189) Nottoosure says:

Hi…I came across this site because of recents events that have taken place with me. I am a 37 year old woman, divorced with no children. I married young (19), but have been told that I look 25 or younger. I was pursued by a very handsome 21 year old about a couple of weeks ago. At first I was hesitant because I live in a small town and everyone knows everyone but the more we talked the more he seemed mature. Well, he invited me to his house, which he lives with his grandma. I didn’t meet her but felt uncomfortable that I was there very late at night, 12 midnight. Well, she came to my workplace and told me to stop seeing her grandson and that I should be ashamed of myself and that he could be my son. All I could say was that I was sorry and that I will never talk to him again. I haven’t contacted this 21 year old ever since and he hasn’t attempted to contact me either. I’ve dated younger guys before, the youngest was 9 years and I swore that I would never date another young guy again because it just didn’t seem to work for me. All the parents of the other guys I’ve dated were very nice to me and really approved of me. This is the first time I was ever ashamed to talk to a younger guy. I understand his grandma’s point of view but it just left a bad taste in my mouth. She told me to find someone my age and it really hurt my feelings. It made me feel like I was disturbed=(

May 23, 2012 at 6:59 pm
(190) Vicky says:

I just want to up date everyone. I am the 42 year old dating the 25 year old black guy. Well it’s to late to tune back now. I just found out I’m pregnant. I just got home from the doctor and I am 6 weeks. I knew that I would end up pregnant. We haven’t used birth control since the last time i wrote in. I can’t believe that I got preggers this fast. It took my ex-husband and I forever to get pregnant with our daughter which is do in about 8 weeks. Well here i go. I am going to call my boyfriend and ask him to move in with me. I be we , you know tonight

May 24, 2012 at 8:18 pm
(191) bobillyboy says:

Does it make any sense to quit smoking if you are suicidal?

Just asking.

/

May 27, 2012 at 6:35 pm
(192) gurL2012 says:

Okay, so i started dating my step brother. No relation. never knew him. just met four months ago and ive been dating him about 4 months. i am 30 with three baby girls living with me and he will be twenty this year. I just was curious as to what yall think about this. I really cant talk to family about it. bahaha. but i REALLY LOVE him. I do. . . responses are great. . . and he says he really loves and cares about me. Which is seems very genuine when he looks at me and says it . I just hate dealing with the family on this crap!!! uggghh.

May 29, 2012 at 4:31 pm
(193) Ginger says:

I have recently met an 18 yr old guy whose maturity level shoots past any 40 yr old man i have ever met. We feel very strong about each other, his parents are ok with me, i have 3 children from previous marriages, 2 from divorce and one by my deceased husband. Is it entirely unacceptable for us to date? I cannot talk to my family, i recently lost my mom and its not a conversation i can have with my dad. my 12 yr old loves him as well. we are going slow, because i have lived, and don’t want him to regret not ever having his own family. He is a hard worker and wants to see this work and so do i…I honestly cant help who i fall in love with, right? Any advice is great, criticism please refrain. Thanks

May 31, 2012 at 2:00 am
(194) Chelsea says:

I do not think that want you are doing is morally wrong or something to beat your self up about, but it seems like an emotionally dangerous place to put your self. I’ve heard a million rules about age and dating, and am my self 27 totally I love with a 22 year old man. However, when in emotional pain that is tied to he family, it seems to me that dating someone closer to your children’s age than your own could be setting your self up for more pain. It seems like it also might be some sort of emotional stress response; like this person is less likely to dissapear because he will probably out live you. A not to women who date true minors however, that is destructive and inductive of control issues. I used to date older men and I am quite sure it did damage to me emotionally. Just because we are not traditionally the ones to abuse and objectify does not mean we aren’t capable of it. Especially now that we finally have some equality and power. We should all be careful not to subconsciously punish kind men, especially young ones, for past errors of our society. Be kind, check your heart, and take care of your self.

May 31, 2012 at 3:38 am
(195) ciovanni says:

i had girlfriend that she was older than me she was 24 and i am 23 yeah its not much but she told me that i am not a man but i didnt have any choise because i had university and i spend all for university i was sending her sms or something i was olways trying something and she is from ukraina and i am from turkey. but i loosed her and really i didnt want this maybe she is right but i didnt have any choise just help me pls i need to tolk with somebody

June 6, 2012 at 12:16 pm
(196) Zigmeister says:

Margaret Mead, the renowned anthropologist once studied a civilization where it was common place for May/November romances to take place. She divined that it was an excellent way to go about it because the sexual drives of the partners at those stages in life matched.

That is what my first wife told me when I was shocked to learn that she was 51 and I was only 29; this was before the “Cougar” thing was Cool. We spent many years together before she died. She was NY-Newport Society and a Julliard trained Jazz pianist with whom I used to sing in the clubs where she gigged or wherever we where that had a piano as; she was somewhat famous and would often be recognized and thus asked to play. She taught me many things about life and they were some of the best years of my life.

And true to Mead’s postulation; I now have a stunningly beautiful Black/Native Brazilian wife 11 years my junior. Our sexual drives match well and I am in turn teaching her. So…from one man’s point of view; it worked out very well. What really matters is do you love each other; I mean really love each other? If so then…nothing else should matter and don’t let people to whom for their own reasons it does matter convince you otherwise.

June 18, 2012 at 5:04 pm
(197) penny says:

I 47 got divorced 8 year ago. I have been dating younger guys only. I just wanted sex and it seems that is all what younger guys today want. I had a slip up and got pregnant 5 years ago with a 21 year old black guy. We married as soon as a found out I was knocked up. I must say that we got some looks. Here is a 42 year old white woman with a big pregnant belly holding hands with a 21 year old black guy. I gave birth to our healthy daughter at 43 and was pregnant again 2 months before my 45 birthday. Had our son at 45. Now 6 months ago when I was 46 I went to get fixed and they found me pregnant again so her I am. I am due in 6 weeks amd I want fixed them. My 26 year old daughter from my first marriage teases me about her not giving me grand babies so I am making them myself. I would not change a thing. I love my younger husband and would trade for anything

June 19, 2012 at 9:34 pm
(198) LISA says:

Ok… here it goes… I am a healthy fit happy fun loving 46 yr old woman who has been told she looks 10 years younger. I met a young man who is 22 yrs old. I use to think wth does he see in me. Im not young and perky, why would he not go for that? Right? Well he says I am educated, love life, my family, loving and caring which is what tunrs him on about me.
I came out of a loveless relationship. A relationship which made me feel sad and lonely. Now, I have someone who I most definitley keep up with who makes me laugh all the time, cheers me up when Im sad, who holds me and kisses me with not a care in the world.
I have no idea what tomorrow will bring and frankly I dont care. For today I feel loved and happy and smile because of it.
Dont depend on anyone but be happy if they make you happy. Smile if they make you smile. Have great sex if that is how he makes you feel. Dont ever be ashamed to keep your heart happy and feel loved.
Life is never perfect and who knows you could even get hurt in the end but dont stop living because your scared.. dont give up on an ounce of happiness because everyone deserves that <3

June 22, 2012 at 11:11 pm
(199) Maria says:

Please do not believe in a long relashionship between a woman and a younger man. I’m 40 , he is 23 .
In the beginning is great than……..Will be’ a tragedy
If you want ti Have fun is ok…..not more than fan

Please , I wright by experience

June 23, 2012 at 10:57 pm
(200) Terri says:

I have just recently started dating a 20 year old and I am 37. I will be 38 on August 13, 2012. He JUST turned 20 in March. He is the one that approached me twice. I started not to even talk to or respond to him, but I finally did. I’m so glad I did. He’s so mature for his age. I am so flattered that he is even attracted to me. I sometimes have mixed feelings and think that he will eventually break my heart and leave me for a younger woman. So, I will just enjoy the moment.

However; he does make references to things in the future. I don’t know, but I really do enjoy his company and just being with him. He makes me feel vibrant and youthful. We even joke about our age difference sometimes, but at the end of the day, we are just attracted to each other and really like each other.

He is attending university, and is in ROTC. He has such great potential if we were to become really serious. He’s the type of man I wish I had married when I was younger. Who knows? He just might be the one. But if he isn’t, the it is what it is.

I am a professional woman myself. I don’t NEED a man, I just WANT one. he makes me feel great and that’s important. I wish that things will work out, but I won’t be surprised if it doesn’t……

I don’t care if you call me a cougar….

June 25, 2012 at 9:47 am
(201) Shadow says:

I have dated a guy 10 years my junior on and off for 6 years, sometimes he is like a child looking for a mom, other times he gives me a thrill of being his gf and I enjoy being with him. He is very moody and unpredicatable but has had a terrible past and his ex pushed him out of a window and beat him up. We are now engaged but there is a problem, I havent told him im 50 this year he thinks im 45 he is 40 going on 25 ! If I tell him he may leave if not how on earth can I keep it from him and we could not marry with lies as a foundation. Not sure how important age is to him, sometimes I tell him to go and find someone younger and other times I feel we can make it, age is stereotyped, judged by your looks/age/etc drives me barmby – but any solid advice out there would be welcome.

August 2, 2012 at 6:10 pm
(202) Lynn says:

OK here it goes. I’m 54 with an 11 year old daughter from a relationship with a younger man. I was 42 and he was 21. It was the fastest time of my life. This boy was on the move all the time. When the dust settled I had a growing tummy. Gave birth without him around and he didn’t even see our daughter until she was 2. He had other things more important things to do. He has never paid anything for our daughter or tried to set up visitation. But that is a hole other story. Do you know how hard it is to find a guy my age with a baby. All you get is freaks that want to drink my breast milk and role play crazy crap. Stay away from younger guys

August 3, 2012 at 1:49 pm
(203) sue says:

Hi Im 42 and dating someone whom is 31 have always dated men older then men so this has been a knew thing for me.I find this person to be a vry beautiful person not just on the outside but the inside and love his energy.Saying that i still feel self conscious i see Iam getting older and I am feeling insecure he has lots of freinds and some females and I suppose i feel threatened.He is not someone i consider a player. I have grown to be very fond and prehaps have faliing in love and he has told me he loves me too but i do see generation gaps and i dont think he believes in the forever thing and i suppose i like the thought of growing old with someone.My concern is i am going to get hurt that i have grown too attached and that he would be able to disconnect more easily.Im afraid of losing him since i see what a catch he is and i also cant quite understand why he is with me when he could have any girl.I also wonder and put to much care into what his freind think and i suppose i feel like im some kind of cougar when we are out in public and i see collegues of mine.have decided to just go with it and enjoy him nothing ventured nothing gained and if my heart geet broken it will hurt but i will be left with some wonderful memories.Did i mention we have been dating for 8 months now.

August 6, 2012 at 7:47 pm
(204) Isabella says:

Hi,

Very interesting article and comments. I know I am late in getting to this but I would love to hear a follow up comment from Diane (4) who said she is 17 years older than her beau. I too am in a similar situation, I am recently separated, no children. I am 44, he is 27. Neither of our families know about us at this point. I feel no age difference when we are together. It’s just been fun and carefree but I am developing feelings for him and am worried about the long term potential. I don’t want to hurt anyone or get hurt.

Would love to hear if you guys are still together and what challenges have come up for you and how you dealt with them.

Thank you!

August 10, 2012 at 5:01 am
(205) Babys mother says:

Hi am turning 30 in October I have been dating a 22 yr old guy, it started when he was going to turn 21 in November, he was friends with my sister he came to my room I was wearing a very short dress, and he saw my underwear by the time I tries to hide things fell from my bed and I tried quickly picking them up, he and he tried to help our mouth were so close to kissing. The next I find an invite on FB and I accepted then he wrote on my wall what would you have done if I kissed you. And we decided to have our conversation inbox. The very same night we met and kissed. The kiss was great and since then we dated and itís been 19 month, but he cheated on in April 2011 gave me STI but the issue is that I am pregnant with his child now(21 weeks), he blames me as if I was trying to trap him. I take care of him get him whatever he wants but he does not treat me well.
My advice to you ladies would be careful with your choices life is tough I am 21 weeks pregnant and I cry everyday he does not want to take responsibility because he is involve with his boss who is about 45yrs or his bosses sister. He sleeps over there every weekend which is the time we can spent time because we are always at work.

August 17, 2012 at 7:17 pm
(206) Jerry says:

I am a thirty three year old guy that has a little something to say. I had an affair with my mother’s best friend “Julia”. when I was 20. Julia got pregnant and decided to keep the baby and tell her husband that it was his. She was only thirty five so having a baby was of normal age. We choose to keep it between us and end was we had. She was my moms very good friend so I was always in some kind of contact. I got to see the baby grow up. When I was thirty I got close with Julia’s oldest daughter Kim. Kim was 20 years old when we became interment. And just as hot as her mother I might add. I got Kim pregnant the third month into our relationship. I was inlove with her and wanted a baby of my own. It did not last, we were done by the time Mikey was one. Well seeing his new grandchild, Mark Julia’s husband and Kim’s father, knew that his wife had cheated on him and wanted, AND got a divorce. So Julia needing money then came to me for child support. That my friends is why Kim and I are over. So long long story short. I pay child support to a mother and a daughter for a son and a daughter. If I had never messed around with an older woman I would still be with the girl of my dreams

August 20, 2012 at 7:50 pm
(207) Amy says:

Ive dated a 29 year old and 28 year old. They both were immature and not at the same level as me and I was 23 at the time. The 29 year old would act like a 15 year old in our relationship but wanted kids and marriage but was no where near emotionally ready to handle either. The 28 year old acted like a child when things wouldn’t go his way. I am currently dating a guy 6 years younger than me. He’s 18 years old and acts like he’s 30. My advice is listen close to the way he responds to certain situations. Listen to his dreams and when he wants them. Some guys are ready to settle at 20 years of age. My second boyfriend wanted it all by 20 if he could have. If you start to change the things you want then it’s time to let go but age doesn’t matter as long as your both on the same page continually

September 4, 2012 at 9:44 pm
(208) Adelle says:

I’m 46 dating a 23 yr old for 6 mnths now. He approached me originally and it was him who lied about his age but came clean on our 2nd date. We both discuss the reality of our situation but still cant seem to stay away from each other.
We dont live in each others pockets but I feel so incredibly comfortable when we are together. There is definitely a strong physical connection and what amazes me is we can talk about anything or not talk at all and just enjoy curling up watchn a vid and chilling. We’re both attractive and in very good physical shape and neither have issues attracting the opposite sex but we seem to just keep gravitating back to each other. The thing that peeves me is the “Cougar” label women get. Truthfully it is more men and especially other younger men who seem to pass comments about us. My guy feels proud to be out with me, but I do find it sits in the back of my mind at times. I guess we will just enjoy each other and see where things go. I find the funniest thing is when hot young women try so hard to get his attention, dont blame them, he is so friggen gorgeous. It may last or it may not, but I know for now I couldn’t be with a more perfect guy who treats me like a queen and who I can be myself with. Relish the happy times I say!!! Life can throw too many other curve balls at us. :-)

September 12, 2012 at 3:31 pm
(209) Nay says:

I am 51 and and look 41 I have been seeing a now 28 (same Guy) for 2 years on and off. After my ex (42) cheated on me.
And the only thing these young boys are good for is a f*** budy.
So dont fool yourself women…

September 13, 2012 at 12:20 am
(210) Sarah says:

It stuns me that there are so many women out there in the same boat as I am…it’s a good thing. At least there’s a few other people who understand what I’m going through. I’m a 35 year old who’s been told she looks younger (personally, I don’t see it, but whatever). :) Anyway, I’m currently dating a guy who is 24 for almost two years now. We met at school at our anime club (don’t laugh!) . We were friends for about a month before we became a couple. I told him from the very beginning my real age, never thinking we’d become a couple. He says my age doesn’t matter to him, he loves me for me. While I’m still in school, he finished his degree. Once he was done with school, he moved back in with his folks. I get that in this day and age, with our crappy economy, college grads commonly do that. I’m not downing him for that at all. I know he’s busting his hump to find a job, but hasn’t had much luck. Here’s where the tough part comes in; because of his lack of life experiences, he’s decided to do volunteer work through AmeriCorps to add something to resume. While we were doing the distance thing already due to his family’s house being 4 hours away, this was tough to swallow, because he’s now in Mississippi while I’m still here in Minnesota. And we can’t communicate nearly as much as we’d like because of busy schedules. Yes, the age difference can come through loud and clear at moments, but he’s very sweet and loving and does make the effort. This is also his first relationship; something I tend to forget at times, so I’m trying to be more patient and understanding.

September 14, 2012 at 9:12 pm
(211) Vett says:

I’m dating a young man age 22, for the past 8 months, I’m 51, and look 10 years younger, I keep myself fit and I just love him to death, he is sweet, and I love his voice, he does work and has a great attitude about family and life, Im at the stage of saying goodbye, but do not know how to tell him. Why? I think at this point its wrong for me to feel the way I do, I’m sure he will be hurt. What shall I do?
I really do not care about the age difference he has stated in the beginning he has always liked older women. I did not pursue him it was the opposite I fought it long and hard and finally gave in. The time has come for me to leave but I do not want too, feeling sad at this point.

September 16, 2012 at 7:59 am
(212) jodie says:

Dating an irishman, his 22, and i am 31… we are living together and all is going well… we have been dating for 7 months now… he has to go home next year in feb, and i am unsure what to do… i love him to bits, so do i decide to move because i love him, or do i stay here and end something that is amazing???

September 18, 2012 at 11:44 am
(213) cougar71 says:

im dating a guy who is 25 and i am 41. we have been together 6 months we are doing fine and have gotton over the hump where people think its wrong, we are compatable and love each other, i have 3 kids who have excepted him but what i am afraid of is his future which he says not to worry about, i can no longer have kids and im afraid he will want them someday!!! being this is the only thing i ever have on my mind when im wuth him.. but for now we are happy and that is what im holding on to.. i do know i have a rough rd ahead, he is young…

September 19, 2012 at 6:46 pm
(214) Gal says:

Hi I am 43 years old and divorced for 7 years now. I have 2 adult children a 2 grand kids. I am now 7 months pregnant to a boy that is just 21. My oldest daughter is 25. Tom is my 22 year old son’s friend that lives with us. What can I say, put two people of the opposite sex in close quarters that they have sex. Yes i used birth control. I use the marina insert. Well I went in for get a new one because it was time and found myself pregnant. Tom tells me that he is in love with me and we are going to make it work. The thing is I don’t know if I can be with him. He is a younger guy that wants younger guy stuff. I am in my 40′s. I just don’t think this is going to work. He talks about me having more. I am done after this. I am going to get fixes.

September 22, 2012 at 10:41 am
(215) Mollie says:

It has been so helpful to read about this. I am 28 and just got out of a 4.5 year relationship with a 34 year old mainly because I realized that he was not the right one for me (for a variety of reasons) and that I was feeling ready to find the right person and start a family in a few year. I didn’t expect to take a trip and by chance meet a gorgeous, sweet, and interesting guy in the airport while waiting in line for our luggage. We had lunch together and I noticed immediately how comfortable I felt being around him and we just clicked really well. As we started talking, he discussed that he had just graduated from high school and was going to start community college in a few months and wants to be a civil engineer (I am in graduate school for social work). I decided that due to his age (19), it would be good to just be friends. So we have been communicating regularly since we meet a few months ago and created a beautiful friendship of being very emotionally supportive of eachother and talking about a lot of deep, heartfelt things. I finally have come to accept that i have some romantic and sexual feelings towards him and we just shared a really sweet first kiss a few days ago. It brings up a lot of thoughts. I would never ask him to settle down and have kids in a few years..he is 19 and just starting out in the world! I am the oldest of 3 and my youngest brother is 22. How would it work to tell my younger brothers that I am dating a 19 year old if him and I get more seriously involved? I hate that I think about these things. How do I get societal norms out of my head? I think it shouldn’t matter. But I can’t imagine telling my parents (who would love for me to find a nice, mature, financially stable Jewish guy close to my age to settle down with) that I am interested in a 19 year old..who is awesome and mature for his age. Something inside of me is telling me to explore this. So much to think about…sigh…

September 23, 2012 at 4:30 pm
(216) Steve says:

I am 22 and have been seeing a 39 year old for a little over a year. She is now like 6 months along with my kid. She told me that she could not get pregnant anymore so we never used BC. At first I was so mad. I did not want to have a baby with a woman my mothers age. But I am finding myself inlove with her. She gets sexier the bigger she gets. It is a turn on to me to know that I am the one that got her pregnant and she knew what she was doing. When I asked her about her not being able to get pregnant. She told me that she wasn’t suppose to be able too after getting her insides freeze out. We are talking about marriage and her having more if she can. I don’t know,,, The thought of getting a woman pregnant in her 40′s is a very big turn on for me

September 26, 2012 at 12:10 am
(217) Jay says:

Well I am in a similar boat only there is just 6 years difference.
Though I have dated a man 11 years my senior before and a man who was in his 50′s (I am 28)

The values were intrinsically different though I could not tell you if that was the individual values or based off past experience.

There were obstacles such as: What If I want to have children? and in both cases the men had been through enough to decide that this was not an option for them. In the reverse, what if he wants to have children?
What if he wants to live in another state or country? I say this because these sorts of impulses are prevalent between 18-30 especially and when one partner is firmly grounded there are complications.

I found another problem was his friends (in both cases) the 50 something year old was too ashamed to even introduce me, not worth talking about the man who was 11 years older seemed to have a similar type of shame, my friends did not get him and his friends could not help their indifference.

So now I am seeing a guy 6 years younger than me. I am so attracted to him and he said likewise, he instigated it out of the blue but now I want to pull myself back knowing how fickle the situation can be.

I understand how difficult it is. People say age does not matter and perhaps the number does not, but life experience and emotional I.Q does matter a great deal, and they are the main issues in my experience.

October 9, 2012 at 8:17 pm
(218) Law Student says:

I’m 32; he turns 23 tomorrow. We met last August in Law School. I have three children. He’s very mature, cause he’s an only child and was surrounded by older people during his chilhood. He’s very sweet to me: opens doors, gave me his jacket when I was cold, touches my arm when he talks to me, so I know he likes me and he’s noticed I like him as well, because I can’t help the reactions when I’m around him. The 10 year age difference kinda freaks me out a little bit, because I’ve never dated someone THAT YOUNG. But I just love everything about him and the fact that we share the same interest and obviously spend so much time together makes it very appealing. What should I do? Nothing has happened between us yet. Should I allow it if he pursues me any further? I am definitely not making any moves. Please answer. I’m lost here. Thanks!

October 29, 2012 at 7:31 pm
(219) DiDi says:

I met a man who told me he was 36, a high school teacher, had 2 roommates, and didn’t wanting children. When we talked and met in person we discovered that we had similar tastes in music, movies, tv shows, that we both loved to travel, that we both loved to volunteer and help others…basically he was the man of my dreams. Within a month, I discovered that he was only 27 (he actually looks 36), worked about 2 hours a day at a school, and lived at home with mom and dad. About 10 months later, he told me, “you can’t give me what I want, a biological child of my own” as an excuse to break up with me. I was dumbstruck. The fact is, we don’t have amazing sex (which the guys my age always asked me or assumed that’s why I’m with him) but we do have a connection that I’ve not experienced with anyone else before. He has an “old soul.” I feel like I am “home” when I am with him. He was the first to tell me that he loved me and still tells me every time we are together. He has a very sweet disposition about himself, something that I find men my own age (44) do not have. In the past 14 months, we have broken-up a few times, but always manage to come back to one another. I do get insecure about our age difference, knowing there’s younger competition, but I don’t wear rose-colored glasses. If he does really want children of his own, then we will be done. However, I can give him everything else that he needs and wants. Sometimes, we end up with people we never thought we’d end up with. I choose to be with him because of how I feel when I am with him. My whole body floods with chemicals and hormones just when I hear his voice or get a text from him. I feel like a school girl again. And I’m aware that these will wear off sometime in the future. I’m not putting pressure on him, I’m just enjoying the “now.” I know that I’m making a choice that could end in heart -break, but like the saying goes, “‘Tis better to have loved and lost Than never to have loved at all.”

November 18, 2012 at 2:23 am
(220) MoonPie39 says:

After reading many of these posts I find myself thinking even more and more on the age difference, I know it shouldnt matter but now I wonder how is my 23 yr old boyfriend going to feel like when he turns perhaps 30? 32? living with a 48 yr old woman. It does hurt to think about it, it makes me very sad because we both are so in love with each other. I am 39 and we been dating for the past 8 months, he has been talking about moving in together, calling it official etc.. he also talked to his parents but the age difference still bothers me. I am divorce with a 12 and 5 yr old children. My marriage only laster 6 yrs, my ex was very abusive. So when I met my new boyfriend I felt like a lot of these women, you feel the security, affection, the sincerity and the great sex but now I think about the future, aging its something we cant stop and I dont know how he will feel later maybe we will be in another stage of our lives like I will be near my 60s when he is in his 40s, I dont know what to do…

November 21, 2012 at 7:33 pm
(221) Danna says:

I am looking to hear from women that had a child with a younger guy and how it worked out. I am 39 and 4 months pregnant with a much much younger guy. He is 18 and moved in with us after his home life went bad. I don’t want to get into why he is living with us. Our relationship is no a real relationship that you would have childred from. .. We just screw here and there. I have been devorced for 11 years and a girl has needs every once in a while. Right now we are not telling anyone that he is the father. I am not sure what to do.He is telling me that he is inlove with me but he don’t know what love is. I have been letting him sleep with me every night and he wants sex every night and in the morning. I am not sure what to do . Please help

November 24, 2012 at 2:31 pm
(222) Franny says:

Ok mature ladies-
here’s the rub with dating most much younger men(I’m sure there are some exceptions). Don’t you remember dating me in your twenties and thinking about what emotional roller coaster rides the men were? The twenties are really hard times for young men because all those societal pressures about getting out there, establishing yourself and supporting a family are coming to a head. Most twenty something year olds are really insecure (for good reason) and people who are insecure behave badly. That’s not to say there aren’t some polished pearls at twenty two, but its going to be super duper rare. I’ve been involved with a guy much younger than myself and although he makes good money and can easily support himself and prob. a little family he’s all over the map emotionally and that’s what I remember about dating guys in their twenties when I was in my twenties. I’m past that stage of my life and am looking forward to a partner that’s calmer and more sane. That person might be younger, but they’ll at least be within the same decade :) Good luck ladies.

November 27, 2012 at 2:02 am
(223) mafiaprincess says:

If a woman not only looks but feels way younger why should she not date a younger man? I just think that lying about your age would work better (not sure how to do that for long term?) but other people will ruin the relationship..by putting it into the guys head that you are old or his family or parents will judge you….so if you are 46 and look 36 why not just say you are 36 it is really no ones business. Try and get a fake ID or your age changed somehow….life is short enjoy it and don’t let others affect you by putting things in your guys head or yours….

December 3, 2012 at 6:01 am
(224) Soulfire34 says:

Am I glad I found this website as I was researching general opinion on older women and younger men.
All the men I have dated have been older by a couple of years, I also married a slightly older (2 years) man and am now divorced, he was lazy in every aspect and we just werent compatible.
About 6 months ago I came out of a 4 year relationship with another older man when I found out some really nasty stuff that had been going on, things that would make your toes curl and not something you would expect from a 35 year old man!
I met a man a couple of weeks ago who is 6 years younger than me, I am 33, he is 27 and he is lovely, he’s mature, completely self sufficient, great career, genuine, affectionate and treats me like a princess. All of the things that neither my ex husband nor my ex boyfriend were.
I was very wary to start with and felt that people might be a bit off with us but no one has been, my family dont mind (my brother has an older wife), my best mates dont mind and when I told the girls at my work, their reply was “so?”.
So although it is very early days I’ve decided to completely ignore the age difference, he doesnt care and my family and best friends dont care so why should I!
We like each other, we share predominantly the same interests and are both looking to settle down but have categorically said that what we have is worth sticking with to find out where it will go, if it works, great, if not, its just the way things go but we arent going to waste the opportunity and will have fun finding out what the future holds

December 11, 2012 at 6:27 pm
(225) candy cane says:

My on is 27 and dating a beauitful Lady that is 40.they have been together 7 year,and still act like teenagers,happiness is what you make of it,live and let live

January 8, 2013 at 8:03 am
(226) barb says:

Ladies
Stop messing around with younger men. I was 41 when I got pregnant to a guy that was 22. I thought I was inlove so I stoppped BC. I became pregnant right a way. Had our girl at 42 and by 44 he was gone. He does not pay me anything. I have not seen him in 2 years. Having a small child has made in hard for me to meet men my own age. I love my children but with I could go back in time you know

February 2, 2013 at 3:07 am
(227) Nic says:

I am 44. My boy friend is 30. He loves that I am mature, well adjusted and know what I want in life. He appreciates that I have my own life so I’m not “clingy” and need everything from him.
I love that he is sexy and verile without wrinkles, gray hair or fat. He listens to new music and is into technology. He isn’t intimidated by my independence. He actually appreciates it. He cooks with me, doesn’t wait for me to cook. He doesn’t expect anything from me but trust and respect.
I don’t look 44. Most people are surprised to learn of our age difference. The fact he is closer in age to my son than he is to me gives it away though. They get along well. They have plenty in common like gaming and movies.

February 23, 2013 at 12:16 pm
(228) Sam says:

I am 31 years old. I am a bartender at a very busy up scale restaurant. I make great money and have access to a lot of older women. Older ladies are my thing so I can’t think of a better job. I like the married or just divorced the best. There are out to find sex and I am just the guy to give it to them. I have never had a married lady over 40 make me wear a condom. And to tell you the truth that sex is the only thing I am their for. A woman in her 40′s turns me on way more then a girl in her 20′s. Ok so ladies, do you want the truth to what or why most younger guy like older ladies. most all of us need to be told what to do. We look to the older female for this. Like our mothers did. But their is a huge bonus to you. We get to have sex with you. It gives the guy the control back. You have it out of the bed room and we have it in the bed room. And what kind of control am I talking about. I bet that all of you ladies with the younger guys have had that guy try to get you pregnant. And what I am talking about is when I am having sex with a 40 something year old woman with a c-section scare unprotected, She knows what shes doing,she has already had a baby. Its up to me to what happens. Do I make her a mother to my child or do I leave her marriage the way it is

March 19, 2013 at 3:28 pm
(229) Fuzzy says:

I appreciate all of the comments on this site. I had never dated anyone younger than myself, in fact my ex-husband was 12 years my senior. I was checking my e-mails on an online dating site when this guy opened an IM window to chat with me. At first glance I actually thought is was an ad for some new service or something so I clicked it off. He is 14 years younger than me and self-admittedly very serious and of course highly attractive. I sometimes feel like I have to apologize for my humor because he is so serious. As in “normal” relationships, there are just as many positive endings as there are negative here so as I always knew, there is no formula for determining whether a realtionship will work or not, its dependant on the people in the relationship. I guess it just doesn’t really matter if someone is younger or older, if it works it works. My relationship is relatively new but the sex is great and maybe it will never turn into much more but I’m totally ok with that. We’re having fun and enjoy each other’s company and that’s good enough for the both of us. As far as the pregnancy comments towards the end of this, if you purposely got pregnant without discussing it with him and then expected a 22-year old to stick around, shame on you. And Sam if you think for a second you are in control of a mature woman in bed, you are sorely mistaken…. if we let you take control its something we give up, we know what we like and what we want, I think some of us are refreshed by an eager man in bed who can let us relax and run the show but we are still in control. To impregnate or not is not a fun game to play either. No one wins with an oops in the oven. Thanks to everyone for your posts, this was a good read. We’ll see where me and my young’en end up but its fun for now and thats all that matters. Maybe thats one reason I like it so much, I’m not so worried about where it will end up tomorrow. :-)

April 8, 2013 at 3:31 pm
(230) Cheyenne says:

I just recently met an 18yr old boy and our attraction to each other was mutual. Problem is I’m 40yrs old. I look like I’m 30 yrs old. I’ve never been married and have no children. As I was talking to this young man, I was surprised by how much he was flirting with me. I’m average looking and he is very handsome. He told me he was old school, I laughed at that because of his age. Because it was ironic because he’s only 18. He said he has an old soul. he likes music from the 60′s etc. He said, he should have been born in the 70′s because he doesn’t feel 18. We just had a common connection. Although I’d like to get to know him better, I’m very, very, scared of what other people would say or think.

April 18, 2013 at 7:56 am
(231) Tammy Wires says:

WOW……I have read all of this and I must say WOW!!!!
I did not think that dating younger men was so wide spread. I just got a divorce and have started dating again. I am 41 and the 20 year old that I have been seeing wants to get real as he calls it. I just don’t know how the other people in my life will act. I just rather just be FWB. I like to be with him and I love the sex. After 18 years of the same man. I found that size dos matter. And getting back to the one guy SAM……..He is right, I have had three younger guys since my divorce and all three have made sure they have came in me. My tubes are tied and I want them to wear a condom but all three of the took the condom off and did not pull out. To tell you the truth, it is very erotic to have young stud try to bred me. T the women that are having babies with these men in their 20′s-good luck I hope it works out

April 18, 2013 at 9:45 pm
(232) Arianna says:

I’m 32 & considering dating a man 8 years younger than me. I enjoy our time together. At first i had somewhat of an issue with the age difference, but we’ve clicked & I’m finding myself not wanting to care about age, especially after reading about these scenarios all week. We have a lot in common & we have a great time together. Yes, i do worry if the age difference will cause issues later; i hope not. I’m now settled on my decision: I’m going to go for it & ride with it; i don’t want to base my section decision on age, especially when there’s plenty of good things on our side.

April 25, 2013 at 4:59 pm
(233) sammy says:

I have been dating a younger man for 6 months , i am 47 he is 28 , our relationship is fantastic , i have never been able to talk to anyone like i talk to him , we have great chemistry and share the same interests , life couldn’t be better , he is loving ,caring and makes me so happy

May 9, 2013 at 8:35 am
(234) Connie says:

I am 38 and my husband is 25. We worked together and got together at our work X-mass party. I believe that I got pregnant new years eve and married in February. I am not giving birth again single. He is so excited about me being pregnant with his baby. I am looking to hear from other women that got married and/or had a child with a younger guy. I know that this is not the best way to start a marriage but things happen and I will love this baby as much as my other 2. My friends at first were in disbelief that i was pregnant and marrying and younger black guy. Everyone says that it wont work out and that her will leave me in a couple of years for a younger girl.

June 23, 2013 at 7:20 pm
(235) Jacqueline16 says:

I think what matters most is WHO that person is inside. Some men are ridiculously immature at 60 and some very mature at 20. I’m currently seeing a man who is 25 and I’m 49. This is quite a difference. But we feel completely connected in mind, heart and body. He looks and acts like a man in his mid thirties. (Has had a very very hard life and learned more than most). I usually pass for late thirties and have always had a very young vibrant outlook. I tend to gravitate now toward younger men because they seem so much more positive and unafraid. I’ve been married twice, as long as my man has been alive, LOL, but we laugh it off. I do have 3 children and one is only 3 years younger than him. I think the taboo needs to be rethought. Younger men CAN be great!!! He is an amazing human being and I’m SO happy to have him. I hope things are long term, but if not, I’ll enjoy what we have now. We love and enjoy each other SO much I just have to give this a shot! Good Luck ALL!!!

July 10, 2013 at 2:43 pm
(236) Samuel says:

The main theme to many posts is—Younger is hot perhaps better. We all want a hot younger twenty something in order to enjoy whatever our needs are. The other theme in posts– I look younger than my age. But youre not younger. You are exactly what your age is period. Most younger people want someone their own age in this country with few exceptions— because youth is very sexy even to other youth. That is reality. If we don’t look our age now we soon will in time. Life is termporary and our bodies DNA will only allow a certain amount of time depending how we live of course. If I am forty and meet a twenty year old lady, in just twenty years I will be sixty. She will still be young at forty. Unless she is really into relationship and most people are not into relationships for the long run with age different unless money is involved. Reality—date someone your age it will work much better in the long run. When I first married was 21 she was 19 and it worked well but she couldn’t live in America being from Europe from her family and wanted me to live in Europe. So, we split up over differences. Age really should marry close ages. Also younger means can be difficult because of maturity(Lack of) and finances. I had older women hit on me but went ewwww no way at that time. Only chics who are my age. I tried a lady 30 years older who was very attractive, but all my friends just made fun of her and myself saying it was like dating my mom. We split up age difference. Looked weird. Stick with someone your age and grow up. Sure a sexy twenty is cool. But, doesn’t really work most the time.

August 7, 2013 at 3:34 am
(237) katrina says:

Im 46 this sep,the lovely man Im dating is 31,Honestly he cant do enougfh for me,I have never had this befor,in bed and out of bed,and the nurturing side of things is so beautiful between us,he sayes he loves me for my heart and how i give all the time ,finally I have found someone like me,age I think plays on my mind but Im going to carry on and see where it ends,you know when someone loves you so much u see and feel it all the time,Nevr had it befor and i have had a car accident 3yrs ago and i dont walk properly and i have scars but this dosent seem to bother him,and he is proud to be with me in public,I recon I wont let this one go,and we both give earch other the time out if we need it,like catching up with the girls. LADYS I RECON IF YOU ARE HAPPY GO WITH THE FLOW ,ITS NOT THE OTHER PEOPLE TRYING TO MAKE U HAPPY,IT IS YOUR LIFE U KNOW WHAT YOU LIKE TAKE IT WHILE LIFE IS IN FRONT OF YOU.

October 28, 2013 at 4:33 pm
(238) Georgia says:

I’m 43 dating a young man 21 actually mentally he’s so old we love each other we have been seeing each other for over 7 months we are getting married in January. Age is a number just respect him and he will do the same for you At first it was very hard but we are fine with it during our second month together I took him to meet my mom she said very little but now she’s fine he went on his own told his parents when we came back from my mom at first his dad was not liking it until he met me now they love me. My children love him he’s great
I was never attracted to younger men but he adores me he treats me like a goddess we have 2 cars and he never wants to let me drive alone he’s very caring we enjoy each others company I don’t look my age so when we started talking as friends he thought I was 32 ha ha he never looked back girls I think it is wrong to go purposely seeking a young man but if love come knocking please answer don’t sweat the age thing. Love conquers all

October 29, 2013 at 7:00 pm
(239) Mommyof3 says:

Hi I am 40 and living with my boyfriend who is 24. We have been together for 5 years and we have a 1 year old son together, his first child and my third. My other sons are 19 and 12 and they love him. We are very happy and he sees a life long commitment with me. Mt problem is I always think one day he will leave me for someone younger. He never does anything to make me feel this way, in fact he says i

November 12, 2013 at 12:26 am
(240) Christina says:

I Am 32, been dating a 21 year old for . Month and half. Interesting how we met, i was in . 7. 11 Complaining how i had paid landscaper and he never finished the work. He offered to help and i was hesitant at first but allowed him to trim my tree ;) . he was not the typical 21 year old in the fact that he was a one woman man and that he expected the same from his partner. One day he took a shower at my place since we were all muddy from the yard . he jokingly said u going to join me . i sat on the toilet contemplating if i should join . i asked him to open the shower and he said he was embarassed because he was happy . i joined and we have been together since . i thought we would have nothing in common , i have a career and he has had many jobs but i was most attracted when he said i will never be on unemployment and he looks down on those that are on it most of their lives. I was a little worried because he made it clear he was not ready to have children , i have 3 . to include a 2. 5 yr old . He is great overall but i notice a few things that are concerns . he does not talk to me when he is with his friends , we talked it over i dont demand all of his time but if we cant see each other at least take a little time to say goodnight . he felt it was a dick move . he also is concerned what others may think of our relationship. i think he is not so worried what people think i look mid twenties but most can tell im older and more settled . i feel as though i love him definitely for the person he is . my children know we do work together on a paper route i took up on the side for extra holiday income and for us to spend some time together .

November 29, 2013 at 5:50 pm
(241) Janna says:

I met my friends neighbor this summer, thought he was cute but left it at that, he’s 26, I’m 44. I’d heard a lot about him, it was just nice to put a face to the name.

Fast forward a couple weeks, I get to know his sister who he lives with, her family, etc. We all become friends. One night he kissed me at my friends house (his neighbor) and things just went from there.

I’m not a stupid woman, I know there’s really no future for us. I love him dearly, he was a friend first and hoping we will always remain friends. He is mature for his age, we all say he’s got an old soul, has a good head on his shoulders and is gorgeous. He was engaged to an older woman but broke it off due to her cheating on him. He has suggested trips together (out of country) and we may be doing that with a group of friends in the spring, but we have taken road trips together and have always had a blast. I adore him, I love spending time with him and we just have fun together. Everything is just so natural.

Here’s my thing though, I am trying to keep this as a FWB thing as in reality, this is exactly what it is, but feelings are starting to creep in. We have never had sober sex, when we get together with friends, we drink and usually end up in bed. Sometimes we cuddle, other times we do more but he’s starting to get under my skin. I’ve had opportunities to date others since I met him but can’t bring myself to do it, even though I know we’re not a ‘couple’. I don’t know where this is going, but I know once feelings get involved, it’s a slippery slope.

My friend has no issues with us together but constantly reminds me that one day he’s going to want to get married and have kids. His sister seemed to have issues with this when she found out what was going on but we talked about it and everything seems fine now, we hang out, do stuff together (with and without him) and it all seems good.

December 12, 2013 at 11:04 pm
(242) Daniel says:

Lots of interesting comments on this site. I’m a 36 year old man dating an older woman (she’s 53). I met her when she was 49 and we’ve been together since. She’s wonderful, caring, very sexy and looks at least 10 years younger than her actual the age. My whole family loves her. The age difference doesn’t bother me since I’ve always been attracted to older women. I find younger women to be more shallow, materialistic and high maintenance, albeit I do spoil my older girlfriend with gifts, fine dining and travelling. Moreover, men tend to age physically faster than women though many men still act immature regardless of their age and I am very content with our relationship. I don’t want any more children. I already have the most wonderful son in the world (from a previous relationship to a younger woman) and she has 2 daughters from a previous marriage to an abusive man (who was two years older). I make her smile and laugh each day and I do plan on marrying her in the near future. All, I can say is that if someone truly loves you then age, race, gender, etc… won’t matter to them. As for young men being immature… the same can be said for some older men. Some young men are CEOs of corporations, while others live in their parents’ basements… Some older men are immature and abusive womanizers, while others are well established and respected men. What can I say? Why discriminate against one group of men? The key phrase to remember is ‘Some but not all…’ There are exceptions. On that end note, I wish everyone the very best in love and in the pursuit of happiness. Cheers.

December 30, 2013 at 3:47 am
(243) Fjo says:

After the end of a 24 year marriage to a slightly younger man, I entered into a FWB situation. He approached me and we eventually hooked up. “Liberating” is how I would describe the sex. (That, or mind blowing!)
We met through a mutual friend and although I know he knew I was older, as I have 3 children ages 14-20, whom I often mentioned he was unaware of my actual age. I’m 48 he is 36.
He recently discovered this and it seems to have completely wigged him out. I find this odd. There was nor will there ever be any chance of this being anything more than sexual companionship. A decision we were both in agreement too. So why is it, now that he is aware of the actual age span, he is no longer interested in continuing our trysts?
Curious, no?

January 2, 2014 at 5:31 pm
(244) Dave says:

Ok. I am in a pinch now. I am 31 qnd started dating sally. Sally is the hottest 44 year old women I have ever met. We pretty much have been living together snce the first night me had sex, Mind blowing sex by the way. Sally told me that we did not have to use birth control because she was too old to have a baby. So for the pass 6 months we been have sex 5 times a week and I hardly ever pull out. Oh christmas day she told me that she was pregnant. Gave me the pregnancy text in a box all wrapped up. Like it was a gift. She is acting all excited about having another baby.
I don’t want any kids at all. If I knew she would get pregnant I would have used a rubber. Like I want to be connected to this chick forever…NO
I just don’t know what to think about all of this.

February 4, 2014 at 6:42 pm
(245) Palomita says:

I was dating a man that was once a friend of mine, 6,5 years my junior- back then me 31, him 25. Something that was to be a light hearted affair grew into an affair of phenomenal intimacy and emotional intensity- in a good way. Yet he broke my heart badly, dumping me for a younger colleague, claiming it’s “the-love-at-the-first-sight”. What was a treasure for me, was scary for him. Unsurprisingly, love at the first sight faded away after few months, 1,5 year have passed, we’re back together and now for a real deal. He needed the time to grow up. And I needed that time to play.

February 19, 2014 at 12:49 pm
(246) Alice says:

I am 30 and the guy i am talking to is 23. I have dated guys 1-2 years younger but never this young. We both pursue the same career and he’s a hard worker for being his age. I haven’t tell my family about him yet but i have been around his family, but his family know the age difference. We love each other but women do mature and age quicker than guys do so this is my concerns. When he first met me he thought i was younger. .. But in reality he looks really young. We have everything in common and as a female i let him take charge and do not control. … He was the first to say he loves me and we text each other every morning afternoon evening and night. .. so good luck ladies. … i will advise if you pick younger men go for the one with goals and career.

February 26, 2014 at 8:06 pm
(247) Chica says:

Hello everyone,

Age does matter when it comes to living together as a husband and a wife. For just dating, most men do not care about women’s age becasuse they want to be laid. I am dating 5 years older woman. I know exactly what I want and what I am doing with her. I just like to be laid. I am a pretender here, not a real lover because I want one or two year(s) younger woman. Don’t get me wrong, sex is wonderful and our conversation and everything is wonderful. But, I am being younger man to her, I get treated very loving way, which I love and I get what I want from her. That’s the whole idea of dating with a older woman. She does not know it. Sorry, ladies.

March 20, 2014 at 11:06 pm
(248) molly says:

I’m 40, he’s 22. Dating for a year now. Everything about him is amazing. He has far more maturity than men my age and I can safely say that this is the best relationship I’ve ever had in my life. The only drawbacks: 1) it’s long-distance since he’s still in college and we see each other a few times a year – but we talk all day every day. 2) I’m afraid to discuss any future plans with him, as he will be fresh out of college and looking to get established with a job and place to live and neither of us know where that will be. I can’t shake the feeling that there’s a timer ticking away at our relationship and will only be sped up when he graduates. I’m not sure when or how to approach the topic of future plans with him. neither of us want to get married; we both feel that marriage only complicates and/or ruins a good relationship, and neither of us wants children, but we’ve never discussed closing the distance or moving in together. Some may say these older woman/younger man relationships are the best, but in reality it’s quite stressful. What the hell do I do? I can’t imagine my life without him in it.

April 15, 2014 at 9:51 am
(249) Regina says:

Here’s the thing, everything that’s being said about some of these younger men can be said about older men, too. When I was in my late teens/early twenties, I only dated men who were significantly older (not because I was attracted to them but they were all over me & I just finally gave in like a LOT of younger women do). They all cheated on me, weren’t serious about me, didn’t bother to remember me on my birthday, and so on. So really, negative traits have nothing to do with someone being younger or older. If you don’t like younger men, there are plenty of old men waving bottles of viagra for you to go out with. there is no shortage of them. Go for it! Knock yourselves out. Me, I enjoy younger guys. that’s all I have to say.

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